Trump found guilty on all counts. Here's the verdict on each of the 34

You can find a list of the 34 rules he violated by searching for 'Donald Trump Rule 34'

Trump imprisoned and removed from ballots.
No other Republican able to run on their ticket.
Biden polling in the drain.
Bernie can still win. Trust the plan, this is Our Revolution.
- This is how we actually end up with RFK Jr lol
  
  Maybe he'll turn out to be a communist and provide everyone with brainworms!
  
  I would love to see that reality and how libs would develop an RFK derangement syndrome.
- It's finally..... Her turn
- Central Park baybee
  
  BRING ME CHRIS MATTHEWS
  
  A guillotine maker sits solemnly, knowing his trade is no longer needed
  Then he hears The Internationale in the distance and picks his hammer back up
- Trump imprisoned and removed from ballots.
  Trump what from the ballots? What slur was here??
  
  I'm so sorry for the confusion everyone, my mom doesn't let me say swears words normally but she gave me permission to explain it here.
  I said doodyhead.
- I want to see how dnc would react if that happened
- removed from the ballots
  Woah woah, slow down
  We're not on the moon yet
- This but JEB

If falsifying business records is a felony then every single business owner in america is a felon.
- All the Maga tiktok livestreams right now saying "this is now coming to our front door" and I'm here saying
  Good, if you commit fraud like this, you deserve it. Tired of the roles getting shot by pigs for not raising hands fast enough while the 1% skate off
  
  Imagine if we committed this kind of fraud with our bank statements, our workers comp claims, our union funds, our insurance payouts, etc.
  
  oh no not the briar patch
- Every cash only business currently scrambling to get a chip reader

Can't wait for him to get the "felon" label officially applied, spend 2 weeks in jail, then get elected while in jail, pardon himself, send the judge and jury to the border camps, then the liberals to cry and do nothing about it.
- New heights of !., most likely coming
  What if we got the libs to roll out the
  just this one time.........
- It's a state case. The president doesn't have pardon power over state cases.
  
  That's what the law says but for the last 30 years "what are you gonna fucking do about it" has worked every time against dems
  
  not yet!
  
  The rules are made up over here in America.
  
  doesn't have pardon power over state cases so far...
- 2 non consecutive weeks in jail. Write this down
  
  I bet he gets an epstein level of confinement only has be there on week nights
  
  Served under house arrest, but not Mar-a-lago. The beach boy cabana house...pool toy closet / filter room that hasn't been cleaned in 5 years.
- maybe someone can ghost write an autobiography for him while he's in jail, they could call it something catchy like My Struggle
- I'd be surprised if he spends even an hour in jail.

he won't face consequences but i'm still cheering. there's a non-zero chance some very funny stuff comes out of this,
- I really want his prison arc where he wins and governs from his cell and decides not to pardon himself because he's become the king of the jail.
  
  he can't vote for himself because he lives in florida lmao
  
  This is crackin me up rn lmao
  
  imagining him having an arc like Fuches from Barry
  
  Kingpin
  
  If I can just have ONE miracle, grant me this one.
- He actually faces a serious sentence
  Biden leans on the NY governor to pardon Trump 'to prove liberals are above that/to show the importance of unity'
  Trump wins the election, immediately tries to get Biden tried for treason vis a vis border security
  
  Listen fat, to heal our country I will suck and fuck my opponent
- Class E penalty carries no minimum sentence, so long as the court agrees that the normal minimum of 1 year is too harsh.
  That's the gist of the penal code

- I think it would be cool if he stopped eating and drinking and withered to death out of fear of maybe possibly seeing the inside of a jail cell for a bit
  
  imagining him just keeling over at sentencing because his poor little heart can't take it
- RIP big fella, goodbye cruel world
- OSHIETE
- discord pwned again

Trump is given a six month suspended sentence. Biden pardons Trump to show bipartisanship and renew faith in American institutions. Trump wins and has Biden executed for treason.

We are all wine moms on this blessed day
- LOOKS LIKE BRUNCH IS BACK ON THE MENU, KIDDO

I'm alone right now, and I'm really dreading my next human interaction. Do I smile and laugh, or do I act really off-putting and ask when Biden goes on trial for genocide now that Trump's done being tried for doing paperwork wrong?
- The latter
- Not in any American court bucko, that's for sure don't make me invade the Hague, what with their malarkey
- both simultaneously
- The latter obviously
  We all do it

Every lib in the country just jizzed their pants
- Libs singing "yub-nub" in the streets
  
  Playing MAGA hats like a set of steel drums
- Hey Siri, play "High Hopes" by Panic at the Disco

cheeto is finito
- SNL is having an orgy as we speak
  
  Alec Baldwin pardon incoming for his contribution to the cause
  
  Thank god the season already ended.

WELL LET'S SEE HIM WIGGLE HIS WAY OUT OF THIS ONE
- Ah, well, nevertheless.

He will wiggle like he's never wiggled before. God tier wiggling.

Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg ... noted that both the trial and verdict were arrived at “in the same manner as every other case that comes through the courtroom doors ... by following the facts and the law and doing so without fear or favor.”
getting high on his own supply
- I too love the justice system that never falsely imprisoned anyone or arrived at verdicts for political reasons haha lol such a noble and righteous institution hehe xD yes
- Bragging Rights

west status: fallen
billions status: must die
- yusssss so good

The New/Federated feed is already being flooded. Time for the random accusations of brigading to begin.

Democracy has just been saved.
- Democrats in shambles because they have to brainstorm new ways to lose to a Trump held in prison
- All thanks to Dark Brandon’s weaponization of the Justice Department amirite

Guilty on 34 counts of being a

Time for some OUTLAW COUNTRY!!!

He's fired

The rule of law has won again, what a great day for liberal democracy
- ladies and gentlemen, we got'em

Party rocked too close to the sun

Sorry drumpf, it’s joever
- No but really as lib as this is I sort of hope this can finally be the end of the year 2016. I mean, I know it won’t be, I just hope
  
  I’d like 2013 to end, but I’ll take 2016z

CNN's website is fucking dogshit, why would I want to see how 30 different people reacted? Just show me the goddamn news.
- That's pretty much all mainstream news now. The worst is articles that are just tweets of people reacting to what happened.
  
  Dave Chappelle called that out like 20 years ago with his "will somebody please find Ja Rule!" joke. It's only gotten worse.

Trump Rule 34 about to pop the fuck OFF

He owns the Supreme Court basically right
- Yeah if you look into Thomas and Alito specifically they’ve got some nasty skeletons in their closets, more like on their lawn. Their crimes are in plain view yet they are supposed to be our highest members of the judiciary.
  
  can we just... you know...
  
  Too bad Dems are so powerless to do anything. Like expand the court. Or pass a law about ethics. Yeah, really, too bad isn't it

Okay so now there's definitely no reason to vote for Biden now
- I thought this changes absolutely nothing materially other than emboldening his clowns? He can still run right?
  
  Eugene V Debs ran for President from prison, so I'd say thats precedent for doing it. But as far as the libs are concerned, they think they got it in the bag. Therefore all the more reason to say I'm not voting for Biden and will encourage everyone around me to do the same since the only reason biden's president is because he isn't trump, and since Trump's "defeated" (until he wriggles out of it again), the democrats should have the heat turned up on them to field literally anyone except biden now

Look what you've done to our sad wet boy.
- Did he hit his head on the cabinet? Classic
- Punished Trump

Rule 34 420 haha

Fuck yeah, gonna smoke weed and watch communist propaganda to celebrate

Honestly kinda surprised about this.

Gonna go ahead and get my “ah well nevertheless” post ready for the 11th

I really didn't expect this at all.

Lol, the walls finally closed in

DON FOUND GUILTY ON 34 COUNTS OF TRYING TO TAKE DOWN FRAMED PHOTOS OF HOT LADIES FROM BUCA DI BEPPO MENS ROOM
- he's so good

He's fired

Mr Former President sir, you're fired (again)

The jury decided that they did indeed have sex.

Lmao

Joe Biden has declared war on all of us future billionaires waaaaa

Trump's Eugene Debs campaign arc when

Ah, well, never the more???

I do not care

the posted link has a lot of "live updates". if you want to see the verdict on each per the title, this is the pdf link: read-verdict-sheet-in-trumps-hush-money-trial.pdf. and for the lazy, screencaps of that pdf:
- Dude's worth hundreds of millions, but he still couldn't help but grift several tens of thousands.