Just so that there are no misunderstandings

Its funny but yes we want a functioning Democracy to defend other democracies.
- Exactly! It’s a pretty radical concept these days, I know.

I can understand your hesitancy, but the position of “Threat to Global Peace and the World Order” has already been taken. We do have an opening for “Bastion of the Free World” and we encourage you to apply. All things considered, you would be a great fit for the role.

It reminds me of an old Polish joke:
A Pole finds a magic lamp, strokes it, and a genie comes out.
"I will grant you three wishes. They can be anything your heart desire."
"I wish for the Mongols to invade Poland!'
"Ok? It is done"
The Mongol hordes sweep through Poland, ransack the country, then go back the way they came.
"I am ready for my second wish. I want the Mongols to invade Poland again!"
"Are you sure? I can give you anything your heart wishes."
"Yes. I am sure"
The Mongols come again, do some more pillaging, and return home.
"And now for my third wish. I want the Mongol hordes to invade Poland a third time."
"Are you really sure?"
"Yes."
"Okay. Before I grant you your wish, would you mind explaining me why you would want that not once but thrice?"
"It's very simple: Whenever the Mongols come to Poland they have to cross Russia twice!"
- The US really is just this hateful polish guy. A solid 35% of americans would happily raze our own country than let one poor person have a subsidized lunch.
- This is so funny. I just told my wife, who's Ukrainian, this joke and she burst out laughing.
  Also, as Canadians. We wish there were mongol hordes we could get to invade us, through the US.
  
  Mongols. Mongols would need to cross both Russia and US.
  
  Well afaik the last in date were your country :p
- Haha russophobia funi
  
  As long as russia keeps invading countries it has no business being in, it is extremely funny.
  
  It's more of a Polish grudge funny though.
  Poland has a bit of a history with Russia too.
  
  There is russian similar joke abour genie that grants wishes, but your neighbour gets twice of that. One of dude's wishes was to poke his eye.

It might work this time!

Alternative you could go by boat, but I'd advice is to travel by land because I expect Poland will join you. (or it's just I'm hoping they will)

I know its a joke but just to note: I'd love to see Germany "march through Poland" given the poor state of Germany's armed forces. As it is rn, Poland alone could most likely reach Russia's heart in a couple of weeks of conventional warfare and debilitate Russian critical infrastructure long before that. Barring nukes of course, which is basically all the Kremlin would have to hang on to in a full out direct confrontation given just how incompetent their armed forces have proven to be.
- I'll have you know that we are perfectly capable to march through allied territory... as long as they have well developed infrastructure
  
  ...which complicates marching through Germany
  
  Amazing trains you got in Germany :p
- That just means we need to give Poland nukes
- And now trump is using Putin's hiring/promotions practices - yay!
  
  Wait, did people start doing parkour outside windows without previous training again?

It kind of reminds me of Terminator 2; where its essentially the exact same story is T1 except this time the previous bad guy is the good guy.

- Ahh polandball. I missed these
  
  These always remind me that I'm a dumb American.
- The irony being that Poland doesn't have border controls towards Germany, but Germany has illegal border controls towards Poland though.
  Just because almost every party decided to go full populist "Screw the people and the economy, there might be Muslim terrorists in Poland"

Germany starts world war 3
The rest of the world: “how do we keep falling for this?”
- "Ww3 this time we're the good guys!" Smaller print "We've double checked and had it put in writing."
  
  The only requirement to be a good guy is to win.
- Everyone loves a good heel-face turn though
  
  First John Cena then Germany

I am ok if Europe wants to send troops to Canada to defend against the real enemy—the United States.
- As an American I fully support this. We don't want to invade Canada either. Just the Orange Idiot and his bootlickers.
- I was going to joke "I'll send y'all intel," but now I'm seriously considering if my country will use that statement against me some day.
  I am joking NSA/DOGE, of course.
  
  I don’t want intel, AMD is better imo.
  
  Too late the van is already on its way
- *Occupied States
  
  If it comes to it, there won't be a conventional battle. We will take them out from within.
  In the wise words of the Arrogant Worms, "We'll take a boat to Washingtooooooon! And burn the White House twice!"
- USA = U Stand Alone.
  As an American, I stand for this. You’ll never see me fight any country besides the enemy within the US.
- Pls do, our army wouldn’t last more than a day against the US
- I'll come to defend the indiginous people from Canadians stealing and polluting their land.

Tbf Poland would be joining them this time around.
- They're allowed to take out one German tank with light cavalry, for old time's sake.
  
  You know...as the battlefield becomes ever more automated, there might be a very brief window where the winged hussars could make a comeback.
  Let's say you have a battlefield riddled with smart drones. They have image recognition and immediately attack anything resembling a tank or other military asset. Do you think anyone bothered to program the drones to seek out and attack a unit outfit like 18th century Polish cavalry? A charge on horseback just might be able to ride completely undisturbed through the right kind of drone-controlled battlefield.
- Last time Russia and Germany invaded Poland together. Presumably this would be Germany and Poland invading Russia.
  
  Does that mean in 100 years it'll be Russia's turn to team up with Poland against Germany? Is that how this works now? Can't we just rock-paper-scissors best 2 of 3 instead?
  
  After the refusal of France, England and Poland to enter a military alliance against the Nazis with the USSR, the only alternative to a partial Soviet occupation of Poland was a total Nazi occupation of Poland. Tell me, would you prefer a total Nazi occupation of Poland?
- They did last time too, just not quite as voluntarily

Ukrainians: "the Germans are here to liberate us from the Russian yoke. And they actually mean it this time!"
- Same nazis as they were

This would be much more concerning if they hadn't so thoroughly stamped out fascism. What's the alternative for Germany?
- stamped out fascism
  Alternative for Germany (Deutschland)
  🤭...
  💀...
  
  Fascism was never stamped out. Wall street supported it heavily and now they fully control the us political and military machine. We came full circle. The nazi’s didnt loose the war their ideology infected those with control today. Central banks funded the third reich and those same financial institutions are still empowered and playing a part today. War and genocide / eugenics is a part of their business model.
- Fascism is back on the rise there, unfortunately.
  
  I thought my little AfD reference at the end would give me away.
- I can’t tell if that’s a lucky coincidence or a reference, but the Alternative for Germany (AfD) are the biggest voices in support of fascism in Germany, and they just won 20% of the seats in parliament. Luckily, even the CXU won’t form a coalition with them yet, so they will hopefully not have much impact on things.
  Ironically, the AfD doesn’t want to militarize against Russia (but don’t be too reassured, they do want to reinstate mandatory conscription and militarize generally, just not against daddy Putin)
- AfD is a nazi party. With tied to Blood and Honor, Proud Boys, constantly yelling nazi quotes, nazi saluting in private and small meetings, copying their rethoric and imagin aso
- Not totally. Fascism did take over 20% of the vote in last month’s election.
- I think the widespread political "unwavering support" for a nation committing Genocide, which is justified by the ethnicity of the people of that nation, kinda shows that some part of Fascism (the whole "people's race is what matters the most and some races are better than others") hasn't at all been stamped out.
  Then there's AfD which is just taking the "if it's good to support them because of their race, then it's good to support us" step closer to Fascism.
  Germany is far closer to a certain philosophy anchored on classifying one's fellow human being as worthy or unworthy depending on race than one would like to believe (certainly, I liked to believe before the political reaction there to whole Gaza thing made it too obvious to deny) - the symbols were made illegal whilst the spirit lives.
- The alternative is to not build a giant army and use the money in something more useful that will benefit germans and humanity
  
  And whenever Russia wants some land it's just handed over?
- Germany was never fully denazified. There's a reason the New Left in Germany was so militant. Kiesinger was in the Nazi Party!
  
  Yeah the Schreibtischnazis and industrial-nazis never got punished. And not to speak of east germany who employed SS and Gestapo members in their StaSi
- Thoroughly?
  Supporting companies? ...
  <cough>

Let's make sure to start the campaign in autumn so we are deep inside Russia during the coldest parts of winter. Let's also make sure to only take light summer clothing.
- As we know, you should always fight a land war in Asia.
  
  At least were not going up against the Sicilians
- That sort of idea seems great when everyone is taking Pervitin all the time.
  Pervitin, the brand name that Meth was originally sold under.
  
  That's so yesterday. Now we use modafinil!
  
  Legal meth? Sign me up!
- Ya know, what with global warming this might actually work.

Poland: "What about attacking Russia alongside with an ally?"
- Aye, I could do that.
- Germany: "i thought these days would never come again. Fighting russia with poland and france like we did late 1700s and early 1800s"
  
  The original band coming back for one more single.
- No thank you. Defensive alliance, sure. But not attacking. We're supposed to be the good guys, after all.
  
  Good luck convincing our politicians not to start a war after giving Rheinmetall a taste of the 800bn budget for a project literally called REARM EUROPE.

Poland has been pouring everything into their military, they are VERY ready for this to all go sideways. I can't blame them.
- Yeah they have a history of things going sideways around them given the location
  
  Also the location of Poland was going sideways multiple times in history
- If it were up to me i would have only 3 conditions to allow poland go wild towards vladivostok
  Please have a winged hursar blow a horn to signal the attack (would be cool)
  Invite germany and france to tag along
  Dont take Königsberg for yourself but you may kick out the russians there <3
- Their next cavalry charge towards enemy tanks is almost ready!
  
  Can we call humans riding other humans or donkeys cavalry?
- Good.

You guys have the most experience with that sort of thing

I'm sure if it came to it, Canada would send some good folks along as well.
- We might get a bit busy but I'm sure we can spare one or two war crimes their way.
- I hope for Canada's sake, and for the sake of NATO and the EU, that Canada puts on some big boy pants and boosts its military. I have seen a lot of talk such as yours, but the reality is that Canada's military is a joke. Canada is so far behind in it's military spending obligation for NATO that they don't even have a timeline for catching up. Canada's airforce is 1/3rd the size of France's and France is the 10th largest Airforce in the world. The Canadian Army only has 22,000 active troops while the entire Canadian Armed Forces is only around 68,000 strong.
  Canada has had troops on the ground for a lot of global military events, but they've almost never fielded a significant number. In the Gulf War they had ~4,500 troops, the Coalition had >950,000 troops and 700,000 of them were from the US. In the War in Afghanistan Canada had ~40,000 troops over 13 years (Operation Enduring Freedom) and at any one point had no more than 2,500 troops deployed. Meanwhile the US had 1.9 million deployed in the same period and at it's peak had over 100,000 troops deployed at once.
  Oh but we gotta talk about WW1 and WW2 because people always take it there. In WW1 Canada deployed 620,000 troops while the US deployed 4.7 million. In WW2 the Allied Powers had a combined total over over 80 million troops, the US had around 16.5 million while Canada had 1.1 million.
  As an American who likes Canada and doesn't agree with the current US political direction, I absolutely hope Canada puts it's money where it's mouth is. When Russia invaded Crimea in 2014 NATO members were supposed to increase their spending to prepare to stand up to Russia and as of 2021 only 5 of the 31 states had met that goal. As of 2024 only 8 states still had not met the goal, but Canada had the special distinction of being the only member state with no timeline on when they would meet that goal.
  In a Politico article from last year
  “The Canadian public doesn’t really see the need,” said Philippe Lagassé, Barton chair at Canada’s Carleton University. “If forced to choose between defense spending, social programs or reducing taxes, defense would always come last. So there’s no political gain to meeting the pledge.”
  With the US threatening to leave NATO the EU has stepped up with a rearmament plan as recently as this week, let's hope Canada does the same.
  
  As an American citizen who hates Donald. I’ll go to Canada and say, “sign me up! I’ll join your military.”
  Anything to get rid of Donald and his goons.
- Hey, they might actually manage the cold! This is brilliant!

"A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do"
Captain hammer. Also Dr. Horrible.
- "The hammer is my penis"
  
  I call it the gavel sometimes, especially when I am in robes

Yeah, we know, irony is dead. But if the world made sense then the Orange Idiot wouldn't be in charge.

Deutschland über alles!

Assuming the internet exists in the future...
- It's a bold assumption.
  I work almost entirely on things that use/need the Internet, and I know enough about how it all works that..... The Internet existing in the future, is not guaranteed. At all.
  
  Same.... it's a weird space to be in mentally.

Wars are fought by people. Everyone who doesn't to end blown up somewhere in a trench in an inter imperialist struggle should be antiwar. Stop fucking beating the drums of war, we need to prevent WW3 from happening, and it's not too late to do so.
Stop cheering for military expenditure, stop electing fascist politicians in Europe, stop buying into war propaganda. We can avoid this war. Do not condemn yourself or your loved ones to passing through the meat grinder, your government doesn't give a fuck about human rights or abour your life.
- Being anti war when Russia is around is essentially the same thing as being pro Russia, because they're willing and able to use violent force to get what they want, and if you're not willing to defend yourself, you will be subjugated.
- Military expenditure is how you avoid war. You think Russia will only attack if Europe is strong? Bizarre.. Also, I don't think it's the fascists who want expenditure, or at least not the far right parties, they are pro russia.
  
  Military expenditure is how you avoid war
  Surely giving more money to the lobbyists of Rheinmetall will make Europe much less likely to go to war!!
  You think Russia will only attack if Europe is strong?
  I think Russia wouldn't attack the EU if we collectively agreed to maintain good relationships with Russia, as was the case for the past 30 years until EU+US pushed NATO boundaries to Russia and started executing Maidans in the former Russian sphere of influence. That's not to absolve the Russian government, they're fascist imperialist pieces of shit, but my point is that so is Europe (e.g. funding genocide in Gaza), and I don't want another inter-imperialist war like WW1
  Also, I don't think it's the fascists who want expenditure
  But you're willing to increase it even at risk of them getting to the government
- Si vis pacem, para bellum.
  
  Oh you spoke in Latin, hence you must be right!
  I want peace, which is why I will push for negotiations and peace agreements between Russia and Europe (and probably the US seeing their tendencies)

If Germany had started with, and stuck to, attacking Russia, I doubt it'd have been a world war. I don't remember who all were Russia's allies at the start, but IIRC only the French were particularly fond of Russia. There weren't a lot of the usual royal contract-through-marriage, were there? Did many nobles have Russian cousins?
- I'm afraid you're gonna have to come up with a specific timeframe here.
  WW1? The Germany Empire wasn't really the spark for this one. The entire royalty of the continent was effectively cousins. There may be some wiggle room, but most of them were literal cousins, with Wilhelm II and Nicholas II being most notable in this context.
  Nobody was 'fond' of Russia in any way. Most European nations then saw it as they do now- large, unpredictable, and territorially aggressive. France and Britain were a part of the Triple Entente not because they trusted each other, but because it was a reasonably sensible counter to the Triple Alliance.
  WW2? Royal intermarriage was mostly a moot point after the first go around even in nations that managed to not get their entire lineages deposed. As for the Soviet Union, still wildly unpopular. If your point is that Nazi Germany might have gotten away with things if they'd stayed tied up with Russia instead of trying to diversify their murder portfolio- I'd disagree. They would have gotten the OK from other Western powers for a time, but would still crumple from internal strife, the war was as much a wallpapering of those issues as it was any grand ambitions of Hitler's.
  
  I think the point is more that for WW2 the other nations would have just left them to it more. Maybe profit off the increased demand for materials. However, the war started because of Germany invading Poland, and you kinda need to go through Poland to get to the USSR.
  Encourage the USSR to try and take all of Poland first, then attack back when they are getting close? Not sure tbh.
  
  Sure, good point; I assumed we were taking about WWII because - as you point out - Germany wasn't the instigator, and OPs post seemed to imply WWII.
  And I disagree about the irrelevance of noble ties at the start of WWII. Yes, most of the countries involved were no longer monarchies, but names still had weight. Take Thurn und Taxis in Germany, for instance.
  I grant that by 1930 they weren't the drivers of policy, and even before that Europe's royalty were regularly going to war with their cousins. But few in the hereditary European elite had many ties to Russia.
  I didn't say Germany would have won a war with Russia, only that if they had, and has stayed focused on Russia, it wouldn't have become a world war. There'd have been no "Allies".
  There's a big caveat there, though, and that's Japan. Germany attacking Russia would have naturally resulted in an alliance with Japan in any case, and once America got involved now the Germans are allied against the Americans. Without the Western front, though, America could have focused all efforts on Japan and might have allied with Russia; the Pacific conflict might have been shorter, and not ended with the Bomb. But once Japan's defeated, does America continue to reinforce Russia against Japan's former allies, the Germans?
  I also wonder what role Africa would have played. Germany was always going to need to go after the oil, and what alliances would have resulted from that? I don't think any of the Western countries saw Africa as anything more than a source of natural resources, so it would have been less "coming to their aid" and more "protecting our assets there".
  Without an invasion of France, or aggression against the UK directly, would the UK have gotten involved, or would Chamberlain's policy held? I feel as if France, if anything, would have only dug in and fortified their borders, and watched.
- #PATTON WAS RIGHT
- Pretty sure that last time they had already taken a couple other countries before heading to Russia. Stopping at Russia was already too late.
  
  Well, yeah. That's why I qualified it with "if they had started with..." You're right, though; they couldn't have invaded Russia without first going through a couple of other countries first. They could have technically invaded Russia while minimally involving other countries by going through Poland to get to Kaliningrad Oblast. But then they'd be stuck again; they'd have to have taken Belarus to get to Moscow.
  So: Poland, Belarus, and next stop: Miscow! Easy peasy. Talk the Japanese out of antagonizing the US and have them focus on Russia, with a promise to divide it. Not that the Japanese would have been much help on mainland Russia, but it'd at least give them something else to worry about.

"the entire western world"
A bunch of crazy politicians want that. The majority of people in both sides wants peace and would like their money to be spend in useful things and not giant armies.
- The russian population is heavily on board with their genocide. Polish are always on board to kick russias ass, most of france, germany, skandinavia, spain and portugal and italy are too. Britain is basicly united on this as one could see in their last parliament seating where even nigle farage was all in. Turkey also stands with ukraine, island is just minding its own buisness and ireland i honestly have no idea what is going on there. BeNeLux is also on board but have their own problems intern, austria is too buissy sniffing essential oils to care, balkan mostly also against russia even serbia though they play both sides. Hungarian and slovakian leaders are the only once deepthroating russian cock
  
  Baltics -> Balkan. Baltics is Estonia, Latvia and Lithuania. They are also preparing for the worst though it's just that Serbia isn't part of it
  
  The russian population is heavily on board with their genocide. Polish are always on board to kick russias ass, most of france, germany, skandinavia, spain and portugal and italy are too.
  That's not true at all, that's what media makes you believe. You ear macron say something and you believe all french people are down to it. The majority of people don't want any war, ask your peers irl.
- No, a bunch of people who want Ukraines sovereignty respected want that. I don't want Germany to invade russia, this person is being hyperbolic. But Germans securing the Ukrainian border is fine.
  
  Nah, I would enjoy a march on Moscow.
- Russia, both politician and population, is not backing down. they have tied their own identity to war. this problem is not going away until its made to go away.
  I assure you. You do not want to live in Russkiy Mir. (The Russian World). where most of europe is enslaved, or dead.
  
  Russia, both politician and population, is not backing down. they have tied their own identity to war. this problem is not going away until its made to go away.
  Following the same logic we should shit on every american because they elected trump. The majority of people don't want war they get brainwashed and get caught into it.
  I assure you. You do not want to live in Russkiy Mir. (The Russian World). where most of europe is enslaved, or dead.
  There are countries with even worst regimes like egypt or saudi arabia. Governments supporting these and waging war against russia are not in good faith. You don't want to live in any country controlled by authoritarian rulers.
- Holy shit, how did it take so long to find someone not wanting to give billions to the military industrial complex that will definitely not use that money to lobby politicians into going to war with which they make profit. Rheinmetall stocks have gone up 1300% in the past 5 years. 1300%. That's not a misspell. 1300%.
  FUCK WAR, I'm not fucking throwing my body into a needless meatgrinding war between imperialist nations.
- I read a lot of news and thus is the first I'm hearing this
  
  Mass media spin the narrative. Ask people irl around you what they think
- LOL...yeah but the peace on their terms never aligns with the peace of the other side. so fuck russia and burn a tesla.
- We've always had a giant army. It just wasn't ours and we can't rely on it any more.
  
  Europe countries armies combined already match and even surpass russia.
- Here is the weasel

Oh no the innocent Germans are being forced to become Nazis by other western countries. It's definitely not because the entire west worked with Nazis after WW2 to "fight communism".
The Nazis never left Germany. They just expanded beyond it.
- They worked with them DURING WW2 from the moment it was clear the germs would lose.
  
  Yep. A lot of Nazi leaders began making their connections with the west as it became obvious that the USSR was winning in the Eastern front as well as Operation Paperclip, etc.

Stop posting/upvoting pictures of tweets.
- stop reacting to posts with tweets.

You know the US is not the "entire western world" right?! I think venezuela would be against it for example.
- Pretty sure the US is an ally of Russia now anyways.