Stuck

They didn't have any abbreviations ready for that sentence
- "So, what code do we put in for the insurance company?"
  
  8=%=D
  
  42069
  
  4011
  
  00003
- If the chief complaint is funny/fucked up enough, we won't abbreviate it
- FGT SPNR STK ON PNS

9‽
- I don't have a penis, but I for one was a total idiot at age 9.
  
  Not having a penis: the perfect counter to the fidgit spinner trap
- Boys start playing with their weiners as soon as their hands can start grasping stuff. It's instinctual.
  
  It's instinctual in that all babies explore their genitals as soon as they can start willfully moving their hands, yes. It's not just boys having a special connection to their genitalia.
- I'm much older than 9 and stuff gets stuck on my penis all the time.
  
  Check out Mr. Popular over here with his social life.
- I dont think 15yo penises fit into fidget spinners, but Im not an expert on child genitalia.
  
  I'll ask my priest.
  
  It really depends on both the size of the fidget spinner and the will of the child.
  
  You misunderstand. It’s a 9yo fidget spinner.
- My wife texted me the other day:
  You know that yellow slide our son carries around? Well, he started sticking his penis in it, you have to talk to him now.
  He's 4. It's just what boys do.
  
  Yeah, children play with their genitals far more than I ever wanted to believe. I don't really remember doing it as a kid, but it wouldn't surprise me if most parents, including mine, have stories about the odd things that happen.
  
  Not just boys. Girls explore and test boundaries with their genitals too.
- You gotta start somewhere.
- I wonder how my life would have changed if i had access to the internet at age 9
- I was jerking off around that age, hadn't ever seen any porn or anything, no need to call child protection, it was just natural for me

The ultimate Helicopter Dick.

15 mins at the swimming pool is cheaper than ER
- He might need to have his penis drained to get it out.
  
  Usually I get mine out before I drain it.

Right foot penis, abdomen penis, back penis, fidgit spinner.. still spinning!

he's literally me

That's why you explain what the helicopter really is...

... But how?
- It's a 9 year old and some spinners have a hole on each side.

Directions unclear

Someone did not know that alcohol makes you soft.
- Yeah. Lets get the 9yo drunk
  
  It builds character, dammit!
  
  Ahahaha. Missed that detail, but it could be 19, 29, 39, 49, 59, 69…well maybe not 69+.

I've seen some different sizes of fidget spinners, but no way is anyone that small lol
- it's a 9 year old
  
  We all know boys don't grow dick and balls until puberty
  
  I mean, as someone who was once 9 (and I'm not lacking but I'm not that gifted either), still idk about this. They used skateboard bearings, like bones reds but cheaper (if you wanna make that shit fly, throw some swiss ceramics in there). I never fidget spun because I'm old but I skated so I recognized them instantly. Maybe if the bearing was popped out, but no way anyone fits in a fidget spinner with the bearing in.
  That axle hole is 8mm, the external diameter is still only 22mm, but maybe, if the wiener in question can squish down to roughly 23mm. Still hard to believe. Reds pictured for reference.
  
  Absolutely not. A baby penis could MAYBE fit in a skateboard bearing. Probably not even then. That’s ridiculous.
- https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/zdv5gv/how_would_you_get_a_small_cylinder_51in_length/

Like it didn't happen to everybody at some point.

Fwizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
- I would have to wonder if there were any nurses/doctors that found themselves spinning a fidget spinner later that day. Maybe they knew where it came from... maybe they didn't.