People younger than 30, what advice would you give to people over 30?

Don't make the same mistake as our generation and fall for TikTok, Instagram and that shit.
Almost everything is better without it, from concerts to weekend trips to relationships.
- It's super sad to see. We used to complain about kids being fed digital "contents" as pacifiers, but now I constantly see older people super fixated with their phone watching tiktok videos. 😔
  
  Computers and their interfaces? Way beyond the familiarity of older folks. TikTok? That’s just rapid-fire TV. That’s channel surfing where every flip is a reward. That’s gambling and standup combined.
  It’s kind of insidious.
- I think that advice is already coming too late
- Are you kidding? The 40-50 generation invented falling for stupidity of social media. Talk to 60-70 gen instead.
  
  True, I hoped the next generation wouldn't make the same mistake...
- Con... certs... Yes i remember !
  
  Con-air and Certs mints, I remember!
- Concerts. Is that some kind of offline activity from the past?
- Okay, try getting past a first date with someone who asks for your "insta".
  
  Maybe it's the wrong person if they can't be with someone who doesn't use Instagram ;)

There's no shame in changing your mind, there is no shame in needing help, there is no shame in self improvement, try to love yourself as a whole and work towards changing the things you don't love.
- That changing your mind is so key. Often times people attach personal value to opinions as though they're related.
  The ego gets involved when it should fuck right off.
  
  Sometimes people around them don’t make it any easier. If people around a person immediately show contempt to a person who admits they were wrong, it enforces a microculture where change is going to be harder and more painful than necessary.
- You can also love the parts you’re going to change, as you change them. You don’t have to turn off the love to do surgery.
  
  That’s very true. I routinely change the parts of me I love. I try to make them better. I’m a kind and loving person, but I’m trying to change that from a selfless form to a self preserving form. To know my limits and stop pouring from an empty cup.

Just because you don't understand something within the first 5 seconds doesn't mean it's stupid.
Also information changes on a daily basis. Just because someone gave you different information than what you were taught doesn't mean they were taught wrong. Look it up.
- As a 30+ person, this hits true. I heard my first friend say "the crap music these kids are listening to". Like dude, have just some self awareness, remember our parents saying green day and blink -182 were crap.
  I would add to this that we don't need to understand something for there to be value to others. There are trends I don't understand, like dancing on tiktok, but it apparently brings the youths joy so have at it.
  
  As a 40+ person, I strongly agree with my young colleague here.
  Listen to what you want, kids. Enjoy it. And don't let anyone tell you you're wrong about it.
  As Common once put it, "If I don't like it, I don't like it, that don't mean that I'm hatin'."
  
  Well, less people are listening new releases each year, more are listening old songs...
  
  Tbf some of the popular music has been shit since music began I'm sure, but there's also always good stuff. For instance rap music, most of it these days is garbage like lil uzi and lil peep, but there's still dudes like Aesop Rock (not ASAP Rocky, Aesop Rock), Run The Jewels, Meyhem Lauren, Lil Nas X, making good shit out there. Pop hasn't been good since the 80s though. Oddly enough I think my favorite stuff from "now" is actually the fact that shoegaze is coming back but called zoomergaze and it's fantastic! The band Julie is a good example, check out their EP Pushing Daisies. Also there's been some really good recent country, namely Charley Crockett and Sturgil Simpson, and (ok it's psychedelic bluegrass but) Billy Strings.
  There is good stuff, we just have to dig through piles of shit for it.
  
  There are trends I don't understand, like dancing on tiktok, but it apparently brings the youths joy so have at it.
  It’s actually called tap dancing, and if you think of that as a youths thing you’re older than dirt.

Burnout is real. Step back for a bit and return rested, instead of abandoning the fight for justice entirely. Taking breaks is just as important as being active.
- No time off from work, back in to the mines with you!

Middle class people often think that they’re barely getting by but forget that they live larger and more luxurious than necessary.
- Yeah but the theft of wealth from the middle class doesn't become false because a few people live it large.
  In fact, middle class is always encouraged to live it large by 24X7 marketing by corporations.
  
  Of course middle class people get stolen from, but they often use their job as an excuse not to organise which is lame imo because I know a lot of people who have it worse and put in way more effort in community building
  
  Just because a comment contains a criticism of X group doesn’t mean it’s a condemnation of the group and thereby a repudiation of all their grievances.
- I've seen this play out first hand with people gradually climbing up the socioeconomic ladder as they reach middle age. They forget how things were at the lower middle class compared to the upper middle or even proper upper class.
  It gets hard to talk about these days with the social media bullshit muddying up discourse. Because people start seeing red at the mere idea of broaching this topic.
  
  People also have no idea what classes mean. Someone making 40k per year and someone making 400k per year will both say they are middle class. And both would be wrong.

Children (be they your own or unrelated children you have responsibility for) are people, not property or pets or whatever. Treat them as such. They're just people with less experience and more vulnerability.

I may be 32, but I can throw in my own thoughts here. Stop paying attention to "societal norms". Societal norms are just there to control people. Do what you love. Watch cartoons and listen to whatever music you want to. You don't have to be an adult at all times. Take a break once in a while.
- Considering the vast majority of people that walk around naked in the public locker room without an ounce of shame are people over 50 or over 60, I find this comment has got it backwards. There seems to be a universal constant that the older you get, the less you care about what other people think. I know I have experienced this myself, and most older people I ask tend to agree vehemently. It also explains why so many young people are embarrassed by their parents.
  My advice to teens and people in their early twenties: don't worry what other people think of you. No one else is thinking about you much at all.
- Hmm. So it's cool to buy the $900 Lego kits?
  
  If you can afford it, sure. If it's money that should be spent elsewhere, you might want to rethink it.
  
  Yes it is, if you have the means to do so. Embrace that inner child
  
  I mean it's your money. Why should I have any say in what you buy with it?
- Why would we know this less than you?
  
  Definitely a broad average but I don't feel like its unfair to say each generation up is a bit more reserved that the younger
  
  I never said I knew better than anyone. I just threw my piece in.
- I’ve never seen someone come out of the closet at 50 and remark that they’re glad they took their time

30 is hurtling at me like a train, so may as well say my bit while I still qualify.
Learn to swallow your ego, and pride, and “seniority”. There’s plenty of people younger than you that are wildly intelligent and truly want to make the world a better place. Let those people take up space. Let young organizers spread their wings. Put your desires to be important aside and help empower the next generation. Feeling valued by the broader society and being allowed to be important can help young people participate and learn to socialize, especially with some of their formative years being ravaged by social media and Covid.
- What about those of us who are older who were never given that chance when we were young?
  We finally have a real opportunity and its our time to step aside?
  Cool, cool, so the Boomers never let us have a chance at anything and now that they are all finally fucking dying, the next generation is like "we know you never actually got a chance but get the fuck out our way."
  That being said, there's plenty of smart and capable youth out there who deserve a chance, it just stinks to be part of a lost generation that never got one.
  
  I think the point of the comment you replied to was to share space and allow the younger generation to flourish in ways that our generation never did. Break the cycle. This doesn't mean sacrificing yourself for younger people, the world is big enough for all of us.
- I’ve never been valuable to the world. But now I’ve gone through a bunch of shit and know things people who haven’t been through that shit don’t know.
  Should I try to share that? I’m not really done trying to be helpful, you know? I haven’t spread my own wings yet, despite being old.
  So should I just give up to make space for young people who want to feel that, or should I chime in with what I’ve learned.

Don't be afraid of healthy change and always admit fault.
While some of the shit coming out in our current generation can be stupid or superfluous always take it in context and see how it could be used to better your life.
Ex. Increase in mental health awareness recontexualizes your childhood.
Also listening. Even if the shit coming out of your child's/younger coworker mouth is some bonkers shit at least listen to them without judgement. Will make any criticism that much better received

- You were in grade school when this was made.
- You realize 31 year olds were only 10 when YouTube came out? They have lived nearly their whole lives with it. Why do so many people under 30 think anyone over 30 is 50 years old?
  
  Dude my mom is 60 and uses youtube all the time, why do people also think 60 is 89?
  Now my (now dead) 89yo relatives? Yeah they didn't use youtube, one of them had a rotary phone until the phone company stopped supporting them in like 2009 and then he had no phone and no internet until the day he died. Had to drive to his house or send him a letter.
  
  When someone is having a computer problem I ask them to restart first. Not because I think they don't know to do it, but just in case. Some people don't know. Sometimes people forget. Obvious advice is useful sometimes.

If something or someone makes you feel bad, get it or them out of your life.
Find contentment within yourself if you want a healthy relationship.
Let go of things and don't let your ego control you.
- BUT: differentiate between a person who makes you feel bad, and a person who makes you realize your conscience feels bad.
  Learn to differentiate challenge from raw toxicity. Generally speaking, if someone is challenging you in a healthy way, then talking about it with them results in you feeling healthier and stronger. If talking about it with them just makes you feel sick and broken, it’s probably more toxic than useful.
- Your family and friends shouldn't constantly hurt you. If they make you feel like crap, flush em down.
- Really feeling this this week, especially the first sentence.
  
  Knocking on the door of 40. I spent this week moving into my own new place after a decade of toxicity, so this one resonates with me as well.

You don't have to have children, don't feel pressured by friends & family.
You don't need to be in a relationship, don't feel pressured by friends & family.
Go travel. See things, eat food, drink wine, enjoy yourself.
- You don't need to be in a relationship, don't feel pressured by friends & family.
  How can i tell this to bills?
  
  Same way you'd tell it to steves I guess
  
  "William, you don't need to be in a relationship,.."
- Yep, this is what I'm going to do. I'm in my 30s now and I'm going to start travelling. I was going to wait until I was in my 40s but I realized nothing is promised so I might as well go ahead and do it now.

Guys, younger than 30 giving tipps to older than 30. Younger to older.
Why is everyone giving relationship advice as if it were the reverse?
- They didn't teach reading comprehension back in the age of steam, I guess. /s
- Bc ppl under 30 think about relationships alot.

I just turned 30 and I am pretty sure a woman is not worth it if she does not provide you peace at home and is constantly looking for drama and conflict. Spent my youth chasing lost causes
As a guy at least in my experience, whenever I leave home I am faced with constant criticism and I have come to the realization that I simply do not have the capacity for it at home as well
- As a stone-age person on Lemmy (47) allow me a response please.
  First of all, I agree with you. Spent my 20s going through the motions thinking “maybe I just won’t meet someone I can bear to be with in the long term”.
  And then I met her.
  But in some respects she also met me at the right time. My assumptions about what I needed to help fix changed. My way of talking to women about their day, their challenges, their ambitions slowly morphed. So I don’t know if “she was perfect for me” or I had finally learnt how the differences between biological males and biological females drove how we communicated, what we needed and expected from each other, allowed me to finally commit to a long term relationship. We’ve been together for 17 years, married for 15. She drives me mad at times, and most days she wants to strangle me slowly, but despite all those small details, we also make each other laugh till we can’t breathe, we agree on almost everything (probably why the small disagreements become so “important”), we manage to parent four kids relatively well and when we finally find the time to have a day by ourselves, I am reminded why I fell in love with her.
  I guess I’m trying to tell you that it might still happen to you too.
- I'm only a few years older than you, but I agree. And I'll also say that some (respectful) criticism at home is ok, and if I'm honest, should be expected.
  We're all not perfect and can't expect to get nothing but praise or adoration from our partners, nor should it be expected of us. But all criticism should come from a place of love and respect; it's not your partner against you about a problem, it's you and your partner against a problem.
  Healthy relationships require hard conversations like that, but no one deserves to be in a relationship where they can't feel comfortable to be themselves without being attacked for it (with some obvious exceptions).

this was an interesting thought, OP. a shame nobody seems to have understood the assignment

Find a hobby that will allow you to keep your sanity during difficult times (unemployment and such) and after you retire.

fucking relax, take a break sometimes, let time fly and just don't give a shit
"but I have responsibilities!!!!!!"
fuck em, put your legs up on the coffee table and I dunno... just stop and think about the minute shit around you. or reminisce. have you called jon recently? fuuuuck man you should hit him up. ohhh you can't arrange a date to meet? then fucking get that one day yourself to meet with him whenever he can
i see so many people over 30 be overworked, overstressed and downright complacent with all the shit they have to go through
just fuck it all for at least one day man, cause if that's what life's supposed to be then i don't wanna get old, just to be surrounded by those who are letting all of life's bullshit control every little fiber of them
- I've thought about this from time to time. Have we been kind of a neurotic generation? I could never tell if it was just me that was seeing things or what. The under 30s seems more indifferent. Might be because they are mostly the children of Gen-X? Are over 30s a bit uptight? How did we end up this way?
  From personal experience growing up so many kids were obsessed with the rat race from way too young. That whole mindset that you must to university to get all your credentials to fit yourself into a cookie cutter. The defacto life track until the illusion started to crack.
  All in all I think the over 30 generation has a really hard time with self reflection. In particular talking about the faults of our own generation. Which is paradoxical against the whole mental health awareness stuff.

Be younger.
- Hahahaha me and my iced back hate you just a little rn

This is interesting - not the advice itself, but for what it suggests under-30s think the over 30s are like, which is that they’re people who’ve not read nearly enough self-help books from the table at the front of the book store.

Living is an art. I grew up in a very rich neighborhood, and despite their wealth, many were troubled. Tons of high functioning drug addicts, alcoholics, Hoarders, narcissists, etc. it was kind of surreal.
We also had a family friend who was poor, not verge of homelessness poor, but impoverished relative to the town we lived. Like everyone, he had his fair share of problems, and worked a lot, but he was happy. Very few things deeply troubled him and he always maintained a calm and collected demeanor. Extremely intelligent too. When I was down, upset, angry, or outright furious, he was always there to impart his wisdom, and I am a better man for it.
Seemingly few people recognize the crucial art of living. Not to live without problems but live in spite of them. So many miserable, privileged people I've met in that town.

I am 30 years old. Ask me anything.
- What new body pains have you found?
  I swear it was like a switch for me
  
  Previous injuries I had when I was young. Like my knee from a baseball injury a long time ago. They just randomly flare up now. But brand new? Lower back. I swear some days it's like a flip of a coin.

The advice I'm most scared not to follow as I get older: don't dismiss everything that the younger generations say or do as being just a trend, and learn more about it.
- Yep. I'm going to fight like hell to never get out of touch.

I don't know if it's even possible anymore (heck it's hard for me at 40), but try to put something in retirement funds. If your work as a 401k, try and contribute. If you leave the job, your money can then go to an IRA. How do you do that? Beats me - I have five or six requirement accounts, each topping out at around between $2-5k.
Also, brush your teeth and if you grind them in your sleep - get a dentist to fit you for a mouth guard.
Edit: wow, down votes for teeth health.
Edit edit: reading comprehension isn't my strong suite.
- It's because you fucked up the assignment. Under 30 give advice, over 30 receive advice.
  
  He fucked up by revealing his age?
- I've "rolled" a couple 401ks into a Vanguard account. Just set up a Vanguard traditional IRA (or Fidelity is good too) and follow their instructions. In both my cases my old 401k admin sent me a check and I forwarded it to Vanguard within a certain time frame. If you don't know what fund to choose just pick "Vanguard Target Retirement XX" for whatever year you turn retirement age (Fidelity has equivalents).
  The reason I say Vanguard or Fidelity is because they have rock bottom fees and also they are huge so they've worked this out with basically everyone.
  
  Fidelity is good, but Vanguard has lower fees. Stick in all in their S&P 500 index.

Get out and make friends. Yes I know it gets harder as you get older, but it’s often the difference between dying alone and demented young and sticking around and finding happiness until your body gives out.
Also, remember your grandparents and parents from time to time after they’re gone. It hurts but it’s good for you.
- I’m trying but I’m in a new place and the past few years every time I start to make a friend….

Give less of a shit of what your peers will think of you, do your own thing as much as you're able. And also read leftist shit, be it Marx or Goldman, that will make you a better person overall.
- Generally, the older you get, the less you care what your peers think of you. You'll notice this as you get older.

I'm in a weird spot here at 30 years old, but let's see...
My advice to ~~younger~~ people would be to take care of their mental health, and to do it via scientific practices.
For example, cognitive behavioral therapy has enough evidence of it working; therapy through spirits, don't. Medication can be necessary and its effectiveness is proven; that's not the case for extreme diets.
Also, philosophical counseling is a thing and it is good, but just like psychotherapy, it may not be enough. Sometimes we are dealing with mental disorders that require pharmacological treatment. Conversely, psychiatry and medication are there for people who need it, but sometimes we don't need it and we need better habits, better environment, counseling, etc. It is usually a combination of many things the way we can start feeling better.
I'll still read the advice from others because, well, I'm sure I can learn a lot from them.
Edit: I thought it was the other way around. Oh, well, it still applies. I wish my parents and other people their age would give mental health treatments a try.

People older than 45, what advice would you give to people younger than 30?

Use Monero
- What is it and why should we use it?
  
  It is the choice of criminals especially drug trade because it is privacy focused and removes the need to transport a lot of money over borders
  
  Haha. It’s an inside joke from the person who made this post. OP is, i believe, a Bitcoin guy who has interacted with the Monero community
  Since you asked, Monero is a privacy-focused cryptocurrency. You can buy some cool stuff online with it, like 1 month VPN access from Mullvad, using https://xmrbazaar.com which is an eBay like site which accepts monero, and VPS and domain names through njal.la
  Definitely a pretty niche thing but it’s a growing community. We don’t show up much on the internet because of the privacy-focused thing; we don’t really frequent twitter, etc, although some do.
- Please dont downvote thinking it’s a crypto troll reply. It’s an inside joke because OP has replied to my posts on Monero in the past :-)