‘Pure greed:’ Etiquette expert explains why tipping has gotten out of control
‘Pure greed:’ Etiquette expert explains why tipping has gotten out of control
We have reached a tipping point in the country over tipping.
Perhaps you’ve noticed. We have reached a tipping point in the country over tipping.
To tip or not to tip has led to Shakespearean soliloquies by customers explaining why they refuse to tip for certain things.
During the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, customers were grateful for those who seemingly risked their safety so we could get groceries, order dinner or anything that made our lives feel normal. A nice tip was the least we could do to show gratitude.
But now that we are out about and back to normal, the custom of tipping for just about everything has somehow remained; and customers are upset.
A new study from Pew Research shows most American adults say tipping is expected in more places than it was five years ago, and there’s no real consensus about how tipping should work.
I went to a brewery recently where they swipe your card at the entrance and hand you a little black credit card type thing. You find your own seats, you go grab a glass, and you insert the card into a slot at a beer tap and pour your own beer, priced by the ounce. If you want food, you go to a kiosk, put your card in, and order food. When it's ready, you go to the kitchen and pick it up to bring back to your seat. When you leave, you bring the card back up to the register and they charge you for all the food and drink. But then it asks you how much you wanna tip. Who the fuck am I tipping? I was my own host, my own bartender, my own waiter, my own bus boy. I haven't seen an actual employee here except for some woman who swiped my credit card during a 5 second interaction.
Tipping should never be expected
I’ve stopped using tipped services entirely now. The only tipping I do is for a waiter at a sit down restaurant.
The mini mart under my building asks me to tip when all I’ve done is bring what I want to a counter. It’s infuriating because there’s no reason for it, it’s literally just there to guilt people into an extra few bucks.
Wow, this "etiquette expert" grift is more interesting than the article itself. https://www.valerieandcompany.com/
Internationally recognized as a National News Contributor, Valerie is an expert in her field of leadership presence and personal branding. She is one of only 20 Master Brand Strategists worldwide and has received front-page press coverage in the Wall Street Journal as a pioneer in executive coaching.
The Etiquette Expert... I'm an expert in these rules to this game I just made up!
I never tip these days. It's a band-aid solution that needs to end.
When tipping, either the customer is getting fucked or the employee; never the owner. I choose to fuckover the employee because they'd rather fuck me and lots of them support tipping culture saying "they make more in tips."
Well, good. You can "make more in tips" without me. I guess that way everyone literally wins.
Like with every single thing that humans try to do to help each other, corporations have figured out how to exploit it for themselves.
We feel like tipping helps people because literally handing money to someone SHOULD help them. Except what actually happens is that corporations, with the full support of the government that they own, simply use that social convention to offset the wages that they have to pay their staff.
Tipping everything was starting long before covid. It was introduced with new interact devices. I first saw it at subways in like 2015
I wonder how much Tax revenue is lost because tipping? When I worked for tips the only tips that got reported to the government was credit cards and I mainly got cash so I could see it being 12-13 thousand a year unreported and I wasn't making even close to other cute waitresses who were easily getting 3-4 times more than me a night and they didn't report cash tips either
Only delivery and restaurants that bring your food to you and bartenders get tips. That's it. Fuck you subway I'm not tipping a sandwich artist. Fuck you Chinese buffet restaurant no tip I went and got up and got my own food.
Start being aggressive about it and I'll go 100% Mr. pink and nobody gets tips ever.
It was understood if you take a bottle of water from the cooler and place it on the counter, the only extra was a thank you to the cashier.
I've run into this and it's bullshit. No.
I wanted to know if it’s ever appropriate to walk away and not leave a tip?
“No,” Sokolosky said.
Also bullshit.
ETA: And this was a stupid article that was poorly written. The interview subject also had little insight. This wouldn't have been upvoted if the topic wasn't viscerally felt by USA citizens because there was nothing said.
I don't tip to pay their wages. I tip for good service. If you provide good service you get a tip. If your attitude sucks or your service sucks you don't get a tip. You want more? Then go above and beyond.
If the problem was outside of your control or impossible for you to correct or know even existed it won't affect the tip. I try to tip in cash.
There's only one thing I still do that requires tipping, and that's because I want to get tattoos. After I started seeing tipping screens at restaurants where I pick up my food at the counter, I stopped eating out entirely. I don't even do fast food. I'm tired of trying to remember or decipher what is socially expected and am just done participating in that system. Just pay people a living wage, charge what you need to charge for that, and if you're offering a worthwhile service, you'll be fine.
and there’s no real consensus about how tipping should work.
Versus how is always worked before?
Because there is consensus on that, it was a very straightfor rule.
The tip was a private transaction between a customer and an employee who went above and beyond the service that the employees' boss require them to do, to perform the job to the customer's satisfaction.
It had nothing to do with the boss or the company they were working for (no tipping automation on the registers, etc.).
And it wasn't ever used in lieu of the employee receiving enough of an income at the company they worked at.
I've contemplated not tipping altogether, already thought it was stupid. Your paycheck should not depend on someone's charity.
The only time I'd tip is for delivery. I don't even count it as a tip, I consider it a "don't spit in my food" tax.
Try this on for size: Tipping is a Legacy of Slavery
This opinion by Michelle Alexander always stuck with me.
I find it annoying to see the option everywhere, but I have continued to just tip on the things I always have at the % I always used. I hate the recommended amount with a passion... the last time I saw it it took the entire order amount and recommended % amounts where based off that. I have never tipped on total, why would after taxes be part of the tip %? Also I have heard mixed things about this but beer and mixed drinks are also removed as well before calculating the total for tipping. I at least will add a dollar for each drink since it's what I would tip if I was at the bar.
This seems to be more of a United States issue rather than a Western issue. In Canada, we didn't start tipping businesses all of a sudden that were never part of tipping culture. We always tipped delivery drivers, and servers, and bartenders, and hairstylists, and uber drivers. I've never seen a tip screen on a McDonalds or Wendys or Popeyes debit machine. I've never seen a tip screen on a retail debit machine. What the hell is going on in the US with tipping? What changed?
UBI
I didn’t listen to the interview, but what is the “going rate” for tipping up front (e.g. DoorDash, Instacart, etc)? For DoorDash, I do a custom tip depending on how far away the restaurant is, not based on the cost of the food. I assume that if they don’t like the tip, they wouldn’t take my job over others (could be wrong). But for grocery shopping, I tip higher because they’re doing a lot more. Just curious what others do.
Here in Europe we have something called "salary" and when there's a price on something, it's the price. The salary should be fair, at least the law says it has to be and mostly it is. And tipping/bargaining is a business practice that will and should die, too much room for greed/fraud/scamming etc, these times are over. And I don't bargain. Very few people I know do it like to do. And that's a good thing. I don't even bargain with business partners, I expect a fair price calculation from the beginning and that's what we do with our customers. And there's a growing trend in business to do this. The room for greed, nepotism and cheating is getting smaller and smaller, some day we'll have a fairer business landscape, for everybody. If a customer or business partner asks why something has that particular price, I just tell him or her. Easy. If he/she goes to someone else, he'll or she'll get a product that hasn't got our quality, he's (or she's) free to do so and people did. And 100% came back to us, not 99%, 100% came back. And if it isn't like that, there's something wrong with us or our product. And it makes it so much easier and fairer for everybody. Times are a'changing!
The first comment on that article when I read it, the guy says he will not tip his delivery driver if there's a delivery fee. I can't believe that after all these years, people still think that a driver is going to see one cent of a delivery fee. I remember Pizza Hut implementing a $1 or $2 delivery fee back in the late 90s, and our tips took a big hit. Back then, I figured that was just a learning curve, and eventually soon people would understand that it is not part of a driver's compensation, but I guess here we are, 25+ years later.
Please don't punish workers for a corporation's greed. A delivery fee is not a tip.
We aren't anywhere near a "tipping point" with regard to tipping. This is just a small number of people not wanting to pay for things, and not realizing that if tipping went away they'd still pay the same fucking total cost.
If your server makes a living by your 15% then the actual service you're being charged for costs 15% more than your menu price. You're just paying part later.
Your alternative to tipping is just servers being paid out X% of food sold, which means that food is going to cost more.
Being bad at math is no basis for an argument.
