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badposting @hexbear.net

KuroXppi [they/them] @hexbear.net

5d ago

Let's play a game. I have 1d6. On a 6 you shit yourself. Comment below and I'll roll for you and let yku know the out come

72 comments

Hi and welcome to the Adam Friedland show
- Uhhh ummm you shit yourself
  
  https://youtu.be/-8aC8Ke9siA cw homophobia at 5:15
About to stand up for my sales pitch - this is my chance to introduce white rompers to the world! Surely I can trust a sneaky little toot…..
- I'm happy to inform you that you rolled a 5. You shit yourself.
  
  Haha hell yeah
ah, is this why 666 is the number of the beast?
- Correct. Also you shit yourself
- not related but my pet theory is it's called "going number two" because you always pee and poo hence using 2 holes ipso facto no 2
- the number of Mister Beast
Aight let's go i feel like a gamble
- Oh crab shit flip i dropped rhe dice and can't find it uhhhh let's um say, it was a four. You shit yourself
  
  HELL YEAH
Russian poolette
- Exactly, but every chamber is loaded (you shit yourself)
Roll for me
- Dice is hotttttt todayyy let's see. You rolled a 3! You shit yourself
  
  3 factorial - yep that'll do it
  
  Yipeeh!
Please 6 please 6 please 6 please 6
- You rolled a 6! You shit yourself :)
hit me
- You rolled a 1. Critical fail. You shit yourself
Roll for +1 slight of hand, I try to pretend I didn't fard
- In this edition you can roll shite of hand. You shit yourself
I'm a level 20 rogue and I just landed a crit sneak attack. Do your worse!
- You rolled a nat 6, with shitical damage. You shit yourself
Ha joke's on you, i refuse to be subject to the probabilistic whims of an uncaring universe. I preemptively shit myself
- Can I still tell your dice roll? (Ir was a 2)
omg
- Wanna roll? It's good odds
  
  of course
I just pooped bout an hour ago so my butt is empty.
- That's what you think. You rolled a five. You shit yourself.
Okay, lets do this
- You rolled a 2. You shit yoursel.
  
  Good thing i preemptively already shat myself so it... oh nvm shat myself again
Hit me
- The fact you didn't say 'shit me' means you deserve this 6. You shit yourself
  
  Hit me
I do not roll the dice thus my pants remain poop free. Just like father marx intended
- Shitdiceroll. A curious game. The winning move is not to play (you shit yourself)
Hell yeah im a copromancer
- You rolled a 3. You shit yourself
  
  I use it to make a shit construct. It shits itself.
I'm not wearing any pants
- You rolled a 6. You shit yourself.
  
  Actually, i shit the floor. Checkmate atheist
Hit me
- Do you have any class modifiers or skills you want to add to the dice roll? You rolled a 2. You shit yourself.
- Each player cam only make one action, one free action and one bonus action per turn. You rolled a 6 - you shit yourself.
Do I do a cartwheel if I get a 5? I've always wanted to do a good cartwheel.
- At this game table we follow the 'rule of cool', so if there's an opportunity to add flair and flourish, I'll allow it. You roll a five, cartwheel and shit yourself.
  
  Fuck yeah I did it! Human shit catapult
let's roll them bones
- Congratulations you rolled a 1 - you shit yourself :)
  
  Hah! Jokes on you, I was sitting on a toilet!

72 comments