What would you buy if you could?

Time.

Have you seen the movie "In Time" about this very thing? Rich people live forever and wealth is accumulated as the duration you can live for. It's a cool concept and a pretty good movie.
- Yes! Low key underrated movie
- Is it anything like Logan's run?
Sound like a good idea, but turning immortality pay to win could, in the worst case, make it, so that only the rich can afford it. And thereby only creating an even greater constantly increasing devide between the population.
- That also makes me think of Alrered Carbon, which covered that concept quite interestingly.

A once off time rewind by 28 years.

Apart from world peace (of course), a change gender voucher. Would probably cost 300 gems or something.

I second the change gender voucher. But a character makeover ticket would be even better.
In what ways are you unsatisfied with your current gender?
- they probably suffer from gender dysphoria

A house by the lake would be nice. Perhaps an island as well.

I would definitely go for a recursive island. It’s an island with a lake, that has an island.
Turns out there’s a ton of them in Finland.
There I would build my house: by a private lake, with a summer house on the private island on the private lake.
- Of everywhere I traveled, my favorite place in the world to visit was Samosir Island in Lake Toba.
  So it's a lake island in a volcanic lake on the Island of Sumatra in the worlds biggest Island country (Indonesia).
  Its not a private Island and there are people living there and even tourists coming regularly. But getting to it is quite the effort, so I call it reclusive in that way.
- It's unfortunelately really hard to get a building permit on a island. They're virtually always vacation home plots. Funnily enough though islands are usually cheaper than the equivalent size of land on the mainland.
- By private do you mean "Already inhabited by 12 billion mosquitos"?

A home

Inhumanity, by way of a new body. The human body is genuinely just awful and I'd love to have something better.

I think I'd quite like to be a free-floating cloud of quantum dots.

A house in the woods.

Speaking and reading all languages.

Mastering all instruments.

Learning the Cha-cha

All the birth control companies.

And then give it away for free.

The vacant lot west of my house.

Proficiency in Ancient Greek, Avestan, Hittite, Old Church Slavonic, Sanskrit, and Tocharian A.

Yes, this can be developed with enough time and effort, but I'm no elf to live a millennium and resources for those languages are awful to find.

Sodalicious fruit snacks.
Wouldn’t Tocharian B be better?
With A you could read mostly Buddhist scriptures that already exist in other languages, but with B you could read more historically-relevant secular works.
- Frankly I'd be a happy camper with either. My focus isn't too much on what those languages were used for, but on Proto-Indo-European reconstruction; having more points of reference is always useful.
  (That said you're right that Toch. B would be better - it seems to be more conservative. I thought that it was the opposite.)

Happiness

A nice piece of land and design my own house to build there

I guess I only need to get rid of my student debt, buy a house, a car that doesn't break down, then I'll buy some friends, I'll buy a nice paying job with a career in my field of expertise and I'll grab some charisma and friend making skills at the checkout

I'd buy more money, obviously.

Cryptocurrency scammers have entered the chat.

I'd buy all my time and my kids', so I could spend their entire childhood with them.

All the politicians, judges, etc. in the entire world

Then maybe some reforms could get done and the world can be better and less corruptable >.>

Freedom from the voluntary prison that my memories keep me in. That or a best friend or something. Either of which kinda cancel themselves out since they had to be purchased :/

My debt

the "means of production" -- according to a dragon in a web comic i read.

Keeping living space clean at all times

This is exactly what im struggling with.

I'd buy houskeeping services for the next few decades. A person or company who tidies and cleans my space, does the laundry, the grocery shopping and cooks healthy non processed meals.

Congress and the Supreme Court so I could once and for all make it so I’m the last one who ever does.

Realistically, a house. However what I really want is to be able to speak every language. There is so much knowledge out there that I cant know without imperfect translation and even then it is still imperfect.

I should buy a boat

A boat's a boat, but a mystery box could be anything! It could even be a boat! I'll take the box.
- Its amazing to think that show used to actually be well written and funny. Not just "Hey Louis! Remember the time I was a dinosaur?" cuts to 64 million years ago, a dinosaur with peters head hehhehhehhehhehheh!!!! cuts back to modern day hehhehhehhehhehhehheh

I'd buy the assets of the wealthy and redistribute it to the poor.

All the politicians in my country.

Futanari maid service

One million dollars.

Happiness.

A private island

And only a trusted few would be allowed on it.

I've seen this one before...
I dream of the same.
With an orange grove.

That looks really neat! What would you make?

I would buy a country and make it a better world than the rest of the world currently is.

Ideal Bars

absolute anarchy

Either a nice, small house by the ocean or my kid’s university fees.

Private jet. Because I hate TSA and I hate the friggin airlines. Completely ruins traveling, which I love.

For something more exotic, I would like to buy the ability to travel back in time.

Other than that, proficiency / mastery of musical instruments and coding or hacking abilities.

A BA in psychology

I want the ignis pixel poi so bad! I have the skill, but not the toy. I could be the most badass sign spinner you ever saw!

A real size statue of me made of gold.

I didn't know Major Lewis had a Lemmy account
- Only played Harvest Moon years ago.

2 top of line gaming rigs. One for gaming and the other for audio/visual work

Superhuman charisma.

I wouldn't like to have charisma, charisma is (in my opinion) just a mask to cover your insecurities, plus I like my autistic behaviour even if it makes me quite the opposite of charismatic. I would rather buy intelligence, even though I'm already great in that department.

One of those decommissioned missile silos/bunkers that's been converted into a house.

My own private jet so that I could fly anywhere I could, whenever I wanted

I dunno if I'd want to magically buy myself the ability to draw; I'd rather magically be able to afford a big house and pay an artist to live with me and draw whatever they want and maybe commission them to draw me with my comfort characters.

Permanent sanity.

Whats your most recent bout of the ol' insanity?
- I used to believe I had developed an inter-universe, romantic, quasi-religious relationship with an anime girl (I will not say who). That ended not long after I started taking meds. Recently the delusion has started to come back on the occasions I need to change meds and I'm without them for a while. Instead of being fulfilling and joyous, though, it's infuriating and shameful.

Some stocks that would increase their value by 50 times guaranteed.

Prints, sculptures and music from a bunch of artists.

modify my kia just like this one

a riding mower. i have health issues and have trouble getting my lawn done. city doesn't like it.

Women

there are some really nice 3rd world countries where you as (I assume) a relatively rich westerner could by a few women (and men too)
Pfft, I can barely afford one.