JD Vance to Americans: Get Off Tinder and Have a Baby

The vice president has some advice for young Americans.

53 comments

James Donald Bowman is a terrible human being
And I will deadname him every chance I have
- Who is that and why are they relevant to this article?
  
  It's the same couchfucker. His birth name has changed a couple times, most recently to Vance around the time he graduated college.

I would like to see Vance try another conservative dating app that will not crash and burn by having a million men and five women. Please make it happen

Yeah, get moving building the slave class workforce they need to prop up the oligarchy!!

fondly remembering the fate of the last politician who told young people to get out and have sex

Why have a pudgy little baby when there’s always one on your TV next to the President?

One can imagine Vance as the type of person who spends a lot of time thinking about how other people have sex
- Big Yellow King vibes
- It's awfully ironic that someone who is so anti-trans is so obsessed with makeup and looking pretty for the cameras. A delicate flower.
  
  Farbeit from me to overwrite what anyone says about their sexuality, but as a bi guy Ive seen probably 20 gay guys exactly like JD Vance and 0 straight guys anything like him lol

Nothing suppresses the procreation instinct quite like JD Vance speaking about procreation.
Edit: Here's an nightmare scenario I unfortunately thought of, and will now share it with everybody. Imagine JD Vance stumping for increasing the birth rate, and watching him awkwardly try to touch pregnant women's bellies while interacting.
- Eww
  
  Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.

I've had just about enough of this mofo's ridiculous eyeliner...
- I see him as a failed unsuccessull jack sparrow wannabe
- The one compliment anyone got from Trump's first admin was that "smokey eyes" thing, and JD's just latched on to it hard

People end up with some truly bizarre beliefs when they're determined to decree what it is that made this country great and so could make it great again, but immediately reject the things that actually did make it great - good wages, progressive taxes and social services.

Get off the couch and stop getting off on the couch, someone should tell this antidei fuck

population collapse is, honestly, a big problem and will increase / be drastic in 1-2 decades when it fully hits.
...so make everything about having a child (housing, child care, food, healthcare) cheaper.
ffs
- Hell I have no faith that would get fixed in my life. So I got snipped
  Partner and I have VERY expensive medical issues. Not going to make a kid go through that