AITA (Am I the Asshole) for Buying My Dress Before the Mother of the Bride?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/livinglife5599 on 2023-07-27 15:25:21+00:00.

AITA for Buying My Dress Before the Mother of the Bride?

Hi everyone, I'm writing this post on behalf of my mom, who isn't on Reddit. She wants to know if she's the asshole in this situation, so here goes. My brother and his fiancée are getting married in November, and my mom, as the mother of the groom, recently went ahead and purchased her dress for the wedding. Being a plus-size lady, finding something off the rack wasn't the best option for her. She visited a bridal shop, picked out a dress she liked, and ordered it.

However, there's a twist. The expected delivery date for the dress was November 10th, which is after the wedding. In order to have enough time for alterations, my mom paid to have the dress expedited, ensuring it would arrive in September instead. Seems reasonable, right? Well, here's the issue. My soon-to-be sister-in-law, who is the sweetest person, expressed to my brother that she's highly offended by the fact that our mom "broke tradition" and bought her dress before the mother of the bride. Apparently, her mom plans on buying a dress off the rack just a month before the wedding, which means if my mom had waited until then, her dress wouldn't have arrived in time.

To add more context, it's important to note that the mother of the bride acted similarly at her own son's wedding last year. She purchased her dress just a couple of weeks before the wedding, suggesting that she might have the same plan for this wedding. So, Is my mom the asshole in this situation? Should she have waited for the mother of the bride to buy her dress first, even though it would have meant risking late delivery and not having enough time for alterations?