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  • Ask for kidnappers number. This is the most care and attention anyone has shown me in a decade...

  • I'd give one of the panic codes.

    Yes, I'm a bit of a weirdo, and yes, I have insisted that all of us have panic codes. Well, all the ones that I care enough about to be in contact with regularly

    • That's a really sensible idea, there's all sorts of situations where you might need to use one. Have any of you ever had to use one?

      • Not one of those, no.

        I have had to use a scramble code though.

        That's an "all hands on deck" phrase where anyone and everyone getting it starts getting ready to roll ASAP. Had to use it when both of my parents had heart attacks within 24 hours of each other. The people relevant to that kind of situation are all in one group chat, so if one of us is in some kind of personal emergency where we'll need support, transportation, whatever, we can send the phrase, and the rest of the group can prep for the usual backup needed.

        In that case, it was simple stuff. Someone to check on pets, making sure the house was locked up, checking the house to make sure nothing dangerous got left going, then waiting for any specific requests.

        That one's been used a handful of times since my best friend and I originally set it up, and then it got expanded to include the folks that are part of our core family. He needed it when his husband broke a leg. My sister needed it twice when my niece was sick as an infant. My friend's husband needed it when he was called on by his family and needed serious support to help them. My mom used it once when she was emotionally overwhelmed with my niece while my sister was out of town.

        But it's a quick way of activating the mutual support network we have.

        When my friend's husband broke his leg, he was out of town, all we knew at first was that my friend sent the code. So we started organizing amongst us for what might be needed momentarily immediately, and what we might need to prep if the situation was major and/or long term.

        So, I got my shit together and went to their place to secure the house in case my friend wasn't in the right frame of mind. Made sure their pets were okay, stuff like that. But I was also communicating with everyone else for whatever might be needed.

        Which meant that when we got word about what had happened, my sister and dad were able to bring me supplies so that they'd be ready for when the guys got home. My guys were able to get home, the pets were in crates so that paths were clear. Had some food cooked up and stored for a few days. That kind of thing.

        Having that phrase available means that you can send it, and just not worry about anything except whatever it is that's coming at you. You know that shit will get handled while you're handling, and that when there's a lull long enough to communicate, you won't have to waste time asking for help with much of anything that can actually be prepared for without details. More, you know that at least one person is going to be awake and waiting for when that lull happens and you can finally communicate, no matter what it is you need to say.

        That's, imo, a much more useful code word than the panic button word.

  • I would call my dad and tell him I was currently at a U2 concert with my favorite musician ever Bono.

    He knows I can't stand U2 and I despise Bono. We disagree about it often. If I suddenly started singing his praises he would know something was wrong.

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