I’m a cop ama

Loooooong time lurker and former r/cth poster and i think i want to make a quick drunk ama for your pleasure...

In 2018 i was unemployed and didn't really have any prospects and I felt like i was at the end of the line with my life as I was drinking heavily and had recently broken up with my gf of 3 years, but then things turned around for me when I was told I should look into joining the NYPD because of the benefits... back then I think starting salary was like 39k and then 110k after 5-10 years of service. But it didn't align with my politics since I consider myself a communist and being a cop is inherintly evil since you're basically a protector of the ruling class and its empire. So i was already putting off taking the exam but i also looked into MTA PD which are the cops that are stationed around the trainstations and since I have an admiration for trains and riding them was my "passtime" if you call it that for the time I was unemployed, then I figured what the hell and took the exam.

Long story short I passed the exam and then joined the academy all while semi hating myself for it but also being happy that i had more money than i ever imagined in my life, and since i was living with my roommates rent was split three ways and it was onl 700 dollars each so 40k for my first year on top of all the overtime i was doing i eventually ended up making over 70k my first year and saving at least 30k of that which went into my portfolio (valued at 200k now). The job is extremely taxing especially with the politics involved but tbh most of the people i work with are kinda alright and aren't really chuddy. Everyone (or at least 97%) of the NYPD hates their job because it's low pay for the ammount of work and time you put in, that on top of how bad things got during the Floyd protests, I got spat on and shoved a lot and part of me was like "guys im a good cop" but i couldn't say anything but just stand there. It was pretty rank and file work and our superiors treated it Like it was just a minor nuisance like "alright guys do this shit again and just be a body don't do anything bad you're being watched by the world right now" and we hated it, at least 11% of my precinct left during 2019-2020 because it was too much for them to handle. I would have too but I had to pay off my mortgage one way or another.

I guess i'll make this an AMA because i'm sure it's rare to have a cop around here and maybe a first. I know we all hate cops but i think I may be able to indulge you for a moment. I can talk about how I was nearly struck by a bullet and the time my partner turned up drunk and got suspended with pay.

I’ll probably start replying to this post whenever I wake up I might be hungover but I’ll try to answer to the best of my abilities, cheers!

29 comments

- DBZ is overrated

Fuck you. Shut up. Never post here again
- Okay

This MUST be a shitpost, right??
If not...
I got spat on and shoved a lot
Finally some great news! May that continue, you pig
and part of me was like "guys im a good cop"
Whatever lies you need to tell yourself to sleep at night while you bash people for protesting. You're clearly very delusional.
You really disgust me. Fuck you

I don't have any questions but I want you to know I hate cops and I hate you. Suck on my ass, pig. Ok bye.

What do you do when don’t kill enough minorities for the day

Is this a 'bit'? If so c/badposting is over there. Otherwise, sure:
What makes you a 'good' cop?
You quite literally admit to helping suppress anti-racism protests. Do you realise how shit that is?
How much time do you spend fighting proles who want basic things in life like food and rights? You already admit it is non-zero.
The more I type, the more I just assume this is a dumb bit.
- lol, of course it's a bit, "guys im a good cop" and admitting to Zootopia roleplaying is just laying it on too thick.
  
  Someone else said I was self flagellating so if I say I’m a “bad cop” then that would further reinforce that narrative. And I was joking about the zootopia thing I thought that was fairly obvious I was doing a bit…
- Being a cop is more boring than you think it is, I’m just an overplayed security guard who has to “guard” (stand around parades for 10 hours) and then go home only to sleep 5 hours and then go back to work again. I’m not a good cop nor a bad one it’s just a job. There are some rare occasions where you’ll have to deal with some incidents but when you see swarms of patrol cars at a scene it’s mostly because we have nothing else to do so being present at a scene is mostly filling the time. It’s that or standing around all day. And the BLM stuff was pretty tame in NYC, it’s a “woke city” so they teach us what not to do, I know a bunch of cops who got suspended because they were acting like dickheads, sure it sucks but all we were doing was standing for hours wishing we were at home- it sucks but it was kinda fun. You get and pick and choose how you deal with a situation and who you deal with, for the most part I’m dealing with altercations, domestic disputes, traffic violations, arson, if I’m on patrol if I give my partner a look like “let’s pretend we didn’t hear the call” we’ll just sit back and ignore it unless it’s something that can come back to bite us in the ass because we ignored a call. I won’t lie that there’s been arrests that have upset me but you can wash your hands of it if you don’t get involved.
- I’m in my mid 20s and I have a nice savings account, when I think low of myself or shitty I just remind myself that it’ll all be chill because I can either take my money and run get another gig somewhere else or retire in 20 years, I’ll be 49 with a pension and that’s better than most can say they have. It sucks as a job but the only time I’ve ever felt like it wasn’t worth it was nearly being shot but even then it would’ve hit my vest and it was only a 9mm round
  
  I’m in my mid 20s and I have a nice savings account
  I'm in my mid 40s, and my savings is shit. My retirement is also shit. It pays to be the arm of the state.

Are you doing a bit? According to my Miranda Rights you have to tell me if I ask directly
- If I was more drunken I would’ve uploaded my badge already
  I’m pretty tired
  
  Yeah no that would have been a bad idea

Some things gotta stay in the drafts. What's going on with you to where you wanna self flagellate like this? Fetish? Depression?
- It’s not really self flagellation lol
  
  I mean, you must have suspected the responses you'd get a little...

Have you ever arrested or beaten someone up to fill a quota? Do you harass the homeless? (even if you're told to do it but you don't want to)
I probably should shit on OP too. I teach secondary school and often I feel like a cop with school policies nowadays, although fuck do I resist bullshit I don't believe in.
- You get suspended if you beat people lol
  Never had to beat anyone but I’ve had to make arrests. Have had to remove homeless people but I talk to them for a bit and maybe give them some cash, my partner is cool and doesn’t give a shit whereas other partners would likely report that I gave a homeless person money because it could be seen as a gratuitous act

If you had to arrest somebody from a classically considered oppressed group to fill a quota, which group would you choose and why
- The brunch class

How do you feel about the bunny from Zootopia?
- I used to hook up with a colleague and we did zootopia role play
  
  Were u the bunny

29 comments