Stalinwolf @ Stalinwolf @lemmy.ca

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2 yr. ago

"HhEv ya MeT tHa DaRK LoRd DaGoN laTeLy?! Uh-hyuck!"

I have cracks on the corners of my fingers, beside the nail. They run deep and I have to put Polysporin with lidocaine on them to reduce the throbbing sting. It's due to a combination of biting my nails and working a job that requires constant antibacterial hand-washing. I hate it.

I always try to imagine the process of deciding, and it's hard to take it seriously.

"Carnidal Donatello has done some great work for the church, and the nuns really like him."

"Yes, sure, I agree with you there. However, I think that Mortimer has been much closer to God. I saw him the other day -- Mortimer, that is, not God -- and I swear he was radiating with light."

"Mortimer truly does radiate with light, but that may have been due to his proximity to the CNPP back in '86, and might explain his extra appendages.... You've certainly been quiet through these deliberations, Marco. What are your thoughts on the matter?"

"Me? Oh. Well.. I kind of like Bill."

Shit's embarrassing. I used to think I was such a clever person, but came across like a loser and a try-hard. Most of them got all of 2 likes, if any.

She has the look of a mom who is also a sister, but also the sister of someone's mom.

And they'll do it again. Make no mistake.

Always fat, stupid fucks that resemble McNuggets.

Immigration Canada wanted proof of my wife and I's relationship, so we dumped a packet of printed call logs on them as thick as a novel. Skype certainly served its purpose.

PARATHOROLOPHUTH!!

My daughter and I saw a video on YouTube a few years back where a kid with a nasally voice and a bad lisp shouted "PARATHOROLOPHUTH!", and now every time we see one on TV or in one of her books, we have to say it exactly like that.

I tried Terraria a few times and I just can't connect with it.

WE.... THOUGHT.... CHUU.... WAS..... A.... TOOOAAAD-UH...

Damn. I went to the dentist for the first time ever (37) and my dentist was cool about it. She said if they've never bothered me, who gives a shit at this point. Fixed my cavities and told me I was awesome.

Like many others have said, the old, lost internet was really something special. Every website was crude and janky, poorly formatted for some specific resolution that you weren't using, and both animated clipart and midis were exciting to collect. There were websites dedicated to them. My brother and I used to fill folders on our desktop with sparkling or flaming banners, signs that read "Under Construction" and more. Same with midis. I'll never forget the first time I discovered Sublime's Santaria in midi form. It may have been my first favorite song.

I wish I could properly articulate what that all felt like. It was a similar feeling to collecting Pokémon cards as a kid. Everything was just a neat spectacle on the mid-90s internet. Then over time, as everything modernized and monetized, it lost that weird magic and became what it is today. I can't remember the last time I gave a shit about exploring a website. I no longer come across spooky animated images of a skeleton peering out of murky water and excitedly tuck it away for future viewing pleasure. The entire thing sucks now, but it probably sucked then, too.

"When asked how they managed to fend off the reptiles, crash survivor Amos Moses said, "I just knock 'em in da head wit a stump."

Sure, but the other comments are well within the range of normal replies to that soft of thing. The other commentors did not launch into a tirade that eventually included baffling accusations of impersonation. That's where things got particularly dicey for me.

Without intending to sound ironic, and given that we're currently having this conversation on a literal Shitpost sub, it's entirely possible that you may be neurodivergent and are not processing the humor.

I don't know either, but thanks for your reply. The more I interact with some of the commentors, the more bewildered I'm left after. First weird interaction I've had on Lemmy.

Yes, it's my primarily language. I thought describing Pixar fan porn artists as ghoulish was humorous, but it seems like there are a lot of advocates present who are defensive of the word.

You're a confusing person and I'm not really sure I understand your psychology, or why you think I'm actively using two accounts to thwart your disability.