Sol_Tradguy [they/them, he/him] @ Sol_Tradguy @hexbear.net

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3 mo. ago

I don't feel especially drawn to being a woman, although being male is very ehh honestly.

i don't really resonate with the egg-crack language b/c it feels very binary trans centric to me (maybe that's just internalized phobia though, i really don't know), but it took me a while to realize cis men and cis women don't generally feel indifferent toward masculinity and femininity respectively, and that made me consider whether i might be on the agender spectrum. it's just something to consider - honestly, when you get into the realm of "very gender-nonconforming cis guy" and "some flavor of enby," the line gets kind of murky and arbitrary (in a freeing - not minimizing - kind of way, in that gender can really be whatever Feels Right). to elaborate, someone in this thread already brought up how being cis-but-gay opens up so, so much more variance in socially acceptable gender expression, and a lot of more outwardly queer gay dudes are probably more nonconforming than I am and are comfortable at "he/him" whereas I'm not, so there truly is a very vibes-based, it-is-what-you-feel dimension to all this.

i do think immediately saying "hehe eggposting" isn't very respectful of your individual journey and falls into the trap a lot of queer people do where they project their personal self discovery process onto others as some universal roadmap, and can lean into gender essentialist bullshit. i've also never been a fan of the "cis people don't think about gender, if you're thinking about it a lot you're trans" line because, while it may contain a grain of truth, i think everyone should be encouraged to think about gender intentionally. e.g., you really think a super cishet gymbro isn't chasing some version of gender euphoria trying to get swole?? (also, certain anxiety disorders cause you to obsessively interrogate questions of identity even if the experiences of those identities clearly don't line up with your personal experience (iykyk))

management's passive aggressive office cops who use indirect violence rather than direct - theyve got the same role, to protect the company and therefore, capital. don't think i've ever met an HR person who hasn't filled me with loathing and/or creeped me out, either malicious automata programmed to deal death through a rictus, artificial smile, or snide 15 year olds stuck in the bodies of 20-30somethings.