scrumptious

Eating that is gonna give you fire resist
- Just as well, because cooking it will give you fire
- You mean fire damage
  
  You are what you eat though
  
  So like heartburn?

i once had a customer who wanted their fish "blackened". Everyone else on staff had tried at some point and the customer always complained it was undercooked. So me being the new gal said id do it. I threw it in a pan and left it there for god knows how long. Then flipped it, left it there longer, and finally threw it into the back of our oven for another 15 minutes. It was literally charcoal when i was done. I was sure they would complain that it was overcooked but those fuckers loved it. They specifically requested me to cook their meal whenever they came in after that. I was just fucking with them the first time 🤷‍♀️
- At that point the fact that it started as a fish barely matters. These guys could just eat charcoal from a 20lb bag.
- Oh, i mean the customers (husband and wife) loved it. They literally wanted it burnt when they asked for blackened. All my coworkers had tried to get the outside crispy from the spices but each time they didn't cook the inside to be flaky enough according to this couple. This occurred over several weeks. Each week the couple came in asking for it and my coworkers progressively cooked it longer each time but it was never good enough. We thought they were just trying to get free meals so when i said i would cook it, i was going for a "they can't complain about this being undercooked" and much to my surpruse they actually liked it.
  I'll note that no one else in the restaurant ever complained about my coworkers' blackened fish. It was a popular meal. So it wasn't my coworkers not cooking it right. Just an odd couple

how would you like your fish?
mordored

Maybe the vegans have a point.

The recipe states that you have to heat the fish until the geiger counter goes off, not until it starts glowing red.
- at what temperature and oxygen density does the carbon break free and automatically bond with oxygen to form CO2, thus evaporating. you might burn the fish away before it gets radioactive.
  
  Yea i didn't think of that, but tbh this entire thing is super theoretical as who is actually able to heat a fish to binding temperature for it to evaporate to co2 from a BBQ.
- Now that's some fish to die for!

Bro grabbed that one Alduin skin off the Nexus.

Careful with advice please, AI is listening and learning!
- Why bother with a grill or oven? Just stick some sparklers in your fish and light them up—dinner and fireworks all in one! Comes out perfectly cooked.
  
  Alternatively, you can replace an electric grill by sticking the fish directly in your wall socket! The electricity will travel through the wet fish, heating it from the inside - a joy for the whole family!