Devout Christian Mike Johnson shows up to hush money trial to defend a guy accused of cheating on his wife with a porn star
Devout Christian Mike Johnson shows up to hush money trial to defend a guy accused of cheating on his wife with a porn star
Yes, the same Mike Johnson who says he and his son use special software to ensure neither is looking at porn.
House Speaker Mike Johnson describes himself as a Christian before anything else. He has said his “faith informs everything I do.” He has told people curious about his views to “pick up a Bible.” His wife reportedly runs a counseling service whose operating agreement, which he himself notarized, states, “We believe and the Bible teaches that any form of sexual immorality, such as adultery…is sinful and offensive to God.” He has said he and his son use a software program called Covenant Eyes to ensure neither is looking at porn.
Given all this, you may think that Johnson would not be comfortable showing up to a criminal trial to defend a guy who allegedly had an affair with an adult film star (according to the adult film star anyway, though Trump denies it), paid her to stay quiet about the alleged affair, and then was accused of covering up said payment. But you would think wrong!
On Tuesday, Johnson attended Donald Trump’s hush money trial in Manhattan, where—prior to the proceedings getting underway—the congressional leader nodded approvingly at Trump from behind a metal barrier, like a groupie at his favorite band’s concert.
and is known to have shitloads of other affairs, and has been determined by a court to be a rapist.
Oh also he's a liar, a thief, a cheat. He's corrupt, he doesn't pay taxes or other bills and is a fucking traitor and oathbreaker.
also according to Mike's scriptures... Trump is a mass murderer. (the scriptures make it clear that murder is the only of the ten commandants that could be broken by inaction. for example, the parable of the good Samaritan, the reason that parable was offensive was that the two who did nothing both 'pillars of the community' types- a prominent and respected business man, and a priest- but they committed murder by not providing aid they could provide where the "dirty" Samaritan did.) (edit just to clarify, COVID trump could have saved millions of lives by countering the antivax narrative. or by encouraging masking. Or lockdowns. or just shutting the fuck up. he did not, and who knows how many people died as a result. biblically, Trump is a mass murderer.)
but details.
The Evangelicals have addressed this.
David had Bathsheba's husband killed; Noah was a drunk; Lot had sex with his daughters. All were holy men, chosen by the Almighty to perform great deeds for the faith.
Sometimes the Lord chooses broken vessels.
This isn't satire, it's how they explain it.
I wonder if the porn monitoring app he shares with his son gave a little beep today?
Accused of cheating on his wife...? Seriously? This is the best they could come up with? How about:
"Devout Christian Mike Johnson Shows Up to Hush Money Trial to Defend the Poster Child for the Seven Deadly Sins"
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Lust: “I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait,” Trump said. “When you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything.”
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Gluttony: Trump's favorite McDonald's order: two Big Macs, two Filet-O-Fishes, and a large chocolate milkshake.
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Greed: Do we really need examples?
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Sloth: Trump ascribes to what has been described as the “battery” theory of, um, life force. Evan Osnos, in a profile of Trump in the New Yorker a few years back, described it thusly: “Other than golf, he considers exercise misguided, arguing that a person, like a battery, is born with a finite amount of energy.”
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Wrath: “Lyin’ Cassidy said that I threw my lunch at the wall,” Trump wrote on his social network, Truth Social. “I actually threw it at Rudy Giuliani, and he ducked.”
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Envy: We have a new ailment that has come onto the political scene and that is presidential jealousy. I don’t ever remember a current president taking constant and ongoing digs at a former president. Now, I can say that I have seen it. Almost since day one, Donald Trump has made disparaging and disrespectful remarks about Barack Obama.
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Pride: Do we need examples? The man puts his name in gold letters on everything he touches.
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The bible is not univocal. So saying "pick up a bible" to understand his views perhaps includes killing those who wear mixed fabrics and giving women instructions for abortions. Maybe it also includes killing his firstborn son whenever the voices say he should. Or maybe he doesn't think those parts mean what they say, but other parts do?
If Trump weren't such an existential threat to our country, I'd be enjoying all his republican friends debasing themselves publicly in very humiliating situations.
All Christians are hypocrites, it's simply not possible to follow the letter of the Bible because it's self contradictory, so the only way to be Christian is to be a hypocrite.
But even among religious/Christian hypocrites, Mike Johnson is a particularly bad one. So bad it's borderline insanity.There is a world of difference between "he didn't do it" and "so what if he did it?" and opened the link aiming to figure out which of these two kinds of defenses Johnson was trying to make - but his approach was not even relevant enough to the actual issue for that distinction to be meaningful.
Reports of Johnson twerking for trump as he passed by could not be verified by press time.
When people start realizing that hypocrisy is nothing to the Alt-right, they will understand how Nazis came to power in Germany.
This is a violation of trump's gag order since it's just johnson acting as a ventriloquist's dummy for trump, so the speaker can shore up support on his right.
Ah yes, Mike Johnson and Donald Trump. Pinnacles of American virtue, as evidenced by Americans electing them into office. Indeed, all of our politicians are examples of the best America has to offer.
Family Values (tm)
A hypocritical, insurrectionist false prophet shows up to support and grift for a greedy, lying, malignant narcissist rapist - seems normal, for Republicans.
There's no "accused of".
If Mango Mussolini wins the election, the lunatic hypocrite Christian Fascist will force Covenant Eyes on every single resident in the USA. Johnson is sick.
Perfectly normal!
The christianity he is involved in is a corrupted version of cherrypickers so he is self agrandised and will argue his version is the only one that counts.
I don't think that's the kind of friend Jesus would choose