The concubine and the literal assassin
The concubine and the literal assassin
Transcription:
A 4chan post with a picture showing the text "I'm not sure what's going on, but my asshole is in danger!"
Be concubine character
High bluff but very basic combat skills and nothing for utility
Supposed to be high level campaign but I'm adamant this is who I want to go with
Have to be carried through every fight basically, party thoroughly annoyed
Finally make it to dark lord's fortress
Betray party and announce I love the dark lord and will do anything for him
Party locked in dungeon while dark lord and me have wedding ceremony
We retire to his chambers to consummate, at this point party telling me and DM to stop this is fucking stupid they just want to D&D not bear witness to our ERP
The dark lord turns his back on us and I reveal myself
Concubine opens her legs and epic level halfling rogue slides out of her ass
This was my true character all along
www.d20srd.org/srd/epic/skills.htm#extremelyTightSpace
I've been rolling to stay hidden up her ass the entire campaign to get close enough to the dark lord to assassinate him
Concubine is just a hired NPC that DM agreed probably had an anal circumference of more than 2 inches and was willing to let it slide
One last roll
With his legendary armour removed and his back turned he never sees me coming
Shoot up there like a flash before he even knows what's happening
Destroy him from the inside like a whirling dervish
Free party from dungeons and clean up the rest of his minions
Entire group is speechless
and that was how I saved the land