hairy situation with dating
context: i met this girl on tinder who's is on the spectrum, we talked for a bit and then exchanged our ig accounts, but she hasnt replied since. I dont understand what happened, if shes just busy, needs time or lost interest. I have no way to tell and im too scared to ask. What should I do?
Personally, I'd send one more message asking to meet for a coffee date. Maybe frame it as a standing offer she can claim in the future if she doesn't have the capacity for it at the moment.
And then move on with your life and don't wait around expecting a reply.
It shows interest, lets her reply in her own time and if the interest is shared lets you become more than just another chain of messages on tinder.
Pro tip for the future: I always exchange cat/pet pics after switching off a dating app. My cat is cuter than me so might as well use that to my advantage! As a bonus I get more pet pics for my collection!
People randomly stop writing. Just let her go and find the next one. Maybe after like a week or two, ask what's going on.
very unlikely ill find someone else, im not very confindent about that. Since this happens once in a blue moon for me. Dating has always been very hard for me
The mindset of clinging to this connection just makes it harder, trust me.
In online dating you have at least a 70% random loss rate that you have no real control over or idea what went wrong. Even in "real" dating, approaching people during hobbies etc, it doesn't work in like 30-50% of the cases where you thought there were sparks.
I know that it's hard, but you'll find someone again. A blue moon happened once, it'll happen again :)
well, i'd suggest you keep waiting for her to message you first, so long as you're okay with never talking to her again. alternatively, you could just message her, not even to ask why the long silence, but just to strike up a new conversation. share a fun fact or something, idk.
but then im afraid of coming off as annoying or even creepy. I dont want to break her barriers just bc i want to talk to her, maybe she needs some time. I wrote her and she didnt even respond
Y'all matched on tinder and traded igs, it isn't creepy for you to message her - that's the whole point!
Wanna know the secret to talking to girls? The secret is that women are very forgiving. They'll forgive you for being annoying, or dumb, or awkward, or creepy, or a jerk. But the one thing they'll never forgive you for is being boring. Hence, the winning strategy with women is to always swing for the fences. Make a dirty joke, or tease her mercilessly, or just fucking ask her on a date! Anything is better than ho-hum fact-sharing conversation!
Here's the thing - right now you're all torn up over whether or not she likes you. Whether or not she is flaking on you. So what do you really want? You want to know. So send her a message where you are completely, unambiguously broadcasting your interest in going on a date with her. Then, forget about her. Send that message, just assume that she is now a dead lead, and move on with your life. And maybe you'll be pleasantly surprised.
How long has she been silent? Days, weeks, hours?
I think she has just popped to the toilet.
two days
ask in tinder if she received your request in insta? idk much about how insta works, but it might be some technical issue and she could think you didn't send request
she followed me and i accepted, then followed her back, sent a message and an image related to the infodump we shared on tinder (a pic of an okonomiyaki), and she never responded
Probably found someone more interesting. I have matched with some ND people on dating apps but it led to nothing, no even soc media profiles exchange, I had much more luck with neurotypicals.