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memes @lemmy.world

kersploosh @sh.itjust.works

1w ago

I am NSFW

22 comments

I If you've ever wanted to kill the joy you have for a hobby, do it for money.

Thank you for reminding me to get paid to masturbate while working from home today.
- Bonus points if you do it during a video meeting.
  
  With the mic unmuted.

But Wonka never got fired for doing what he loved: murdering bratty children with experimental chemicals and industrial equipment!
- No lives were lost on factory grounds, or as a result of having been exposed to active machinery. We have lawyers!
- He was the CEO and the entire Board...
  
  And he no longer owned the company afterward, so it’s kind of like losing his job. Or just spectacularly quitting.
  
  One of my favorite SNL sketches features Al Gore as Willy Wonka’s brother addressing some of those issues.
- I am just realizing that Charlie is going to inherit some lawsuits along with the factory. That's the real reason Wonka was looking for a successor.

Make your passion your job and you won't have passion but you'll have another job.
- "I love programming, I wouldn't mind doing it for rest of my life" mfs when they have to compete with that one dude who has been doing leetcode since age of 4 for a job application.

So, you're saying that rolling around naked in beans got you fired?
Good to know, thanks for sharing
- Well, that depends on what your job is.
  
  Some things aren't a job, they're a calling

Jokes on you, I play !dailygames@lemmy.zip and Cracking the Cryptic all day

relevant

What do you mean "you cannot jerk off in the office"?

SQUIRTING

22 comments