What’s a totally useless skill you have but are weirdly proud of?

I can read text in any orientation, even if mirrored, as easily as if it was right side up / not mirrored. Not sure why, and almost completely useless, but was surprised to discover that supposedly not everyone can do this?
- Just as easily from every angle? No slowdown at all, even for mirrored text?
  That's pretty cool, even if it is mostly useless.

I'm a very large person (250lb/110kg, over 6'/1.8m) and I walk almost silently, unless I'm trying to be loud. I've learned to make some kind of noise when approaching people from behind, because otherwise it almost guarantees a jump scare
- I'm the opposite. Petite 5'0" lady who sounds like an entire community of elephants when I walk.
- Hahaha I'm the same. Totally perfected ninja walking

I can pick things up with my toes. Not completely useless, maybe, but not exactly the pinnacle of tricks!
- Me too! I blame it entirely on my literal childhood interpretation of someone telling me to "cross my fingers and toes" - learned how to cross all of my toes, then picking things up came naturally after that 😂
- Haha me too! When I was a kid my podiatrist told me it would be good physical therapy for the growing pains I had along with flat feet. Not sure if it worked but it definitely kept me entertained!
- Yoooo, I have fingertoes too!

I can do a spot-on impression of the standard deep, booming monster-truck rally advertising voice.
"This FRIDAY! (Friday... Friday...) Only at the Gigantodome! Beer Swiller Productions presents MONSTER TRUCK MAYHEM! You'll pay for the entire seat but you'll only need the EDGGGGGGGGE!"
Well... of course you can't hear it, but if you could, seriously, it's dead-on.
- No no, I heard it, it was good.

I can type really loud and pretty fast. At least, faster than anyone I know. And it's so loud that it ruins any song that's playing. Big keyboard with clicky switches and foam lining on the PCB to make it extra deep. It sounds like a foam dart mini gun and it makes me feel about eight feet tall. Totally frivolous and obnoxious, but I love it.
(Home office, I'm not a total psycho)

I’m basically a drug dog but for Dr. Pepper.
When my friends and family get different dark colas in their food orders and can’t determine which is which they have me sniff it out.
Can’t quite do it for other colas but it’s a fun little hill I’ll die on for others’ benefit (I hate Dr. Pepper).

I can beat the original Pikmin game in 7 in-game days, which is very close to the limit to how fast the game can be beaten which is 6 days!

Tuvan throat singing. Nobody knows I can do it. I perfected it during a 3hr commute to work each day for a decade.

I'm completely ambidextrous. It comes into "handy" when one hand gets tired doing a task, like writing for a long time, but no one has ever noticed and I don't think anyone would be impressed.

Not entirely useless, but I can throw something into a trash can damn near every time without missing. Even if I can't see the trash can, but know where it is

I can use right-handed scissors with my left hand, and I can knit in both directions without switching hands. I guess being ambidextrous isn’t totally useless (if I ever break my right hand, I’ll still be able to do most things), but it’s not really useful most of the time.

I play the drums, but not in a band or anything. It's pretty useless, but I'm glad I got good enough I could just play along with random songs and have fun at home. I didn't stick with any other instrument I've tried to learn, so I'm pretty proud of myself to still be at it after twenty years.

No one can beat me at simon, that four color memory game. I don't remember what my high score was but I can easily get to level 60 before I start to struggle
- If I saw this in a Tinder bio, I would swipe right.
  
  I'm not on tinder, is that the good way or the bad way?

I'm really good at palming coins and doing variations of disappearing coin tricks. Suck at any other form of slight-of-hand but I can make a coin-sized object look like it vanished with remarkable ease and smoothness.

I can handwrite cyphered text as fast as I can write ordinarily. Never have practiced reading the cyphered text though so reading notes that I took in cypher is a pain in the ass...