"Gatekeeping" is when you don't think "Dragonfucker" is a gender

Dragon is a purity test troll:

By using absurd conversational standards backed by the reasoning of "nontraditional identification / self", they troll both you, and mods into playing the purity "jump how high" game. If the mods flinch, and tell them to tone it down, the community will eat them alive. If they call you out, the mod has to pull the trigger.

I'm not saying the mods are free from blame, but they are so high on their own supply that banning you is the only option.

Non binary folks deserve respect. Non traditional pronouns are worth respect. The way dragon uses them is a problem because they are inconsistent with any logic... They use them semantically wrong

I think that account is a social experiment designed to see how fucking bizarre of a line of bullshit can they force down other people's throats

Yeah, they've kinda lost the point.

Don't know that it's power tripping because it's a matter of whether or not you believe that neopronouns are or are not part of trans rights and trans issues. If you do, then they're maintaining their space as a place for trans and trans adjacent folks to not have to deal with the bullshit of constantly defending and fighting for every single thing.

So I get it. Once you believe that, and you're maintaining a space for trans people, you absolutely have to draw that line.

I don't agree with it, but that's not the point. It doesn't matter if I agree or not. It only matters that blahaj is a trans space first and above anything else, and they do buy into neopronouns.

They've also bought into protecting a couple of trolls because of that, but that's the down side.

But, yeah, it's a fucking mess when you can't even use a broadly accepted neutral term as the default until you have a specific one. Which, being real, keeping track of random online user names and their choice of pronouns just isn't worth it. Why the fuck should anyone bother?

Irl? Absolutely. You've got faces to connect things to. But online, with people that are essentially acquaintances at best, how the fuck are you going to remember that doggyboy19 is the one that uses xexu, but puppyboy18 uses xenu? My dyslexic ass already has enough trouble keeping track of the user names that don't have partterns that match established words. Neopronouns amount to a random string of lines and circles to me, there's no fucking pattern to memorize at all, there's nothing I can use to keep track of them.

Which is going off the topic of your post here, but it's one of the reasons "they" is a shit ton better. You don't have dyslexics, people with English as a second or third language trying to have a nice conversation and being treated like an asshole because they can't follow the randomly chosen garbles used by some of the more absurd neopronoun folks.

Just going to drop this here, it seems relevant.

The effect created by such Internet trolls is not very big, but they manage to make certain forums meaningless because people stop commenting on the articles when these trolls sit there and constantly create an aggressive, hostile atmosphere toward those whom they don’t like. The trolls react to certain news with torrents of mud and abuse. This makes it meaningless for a reasonable person to comment on anything there.

I think there are some people here who have become kung fu masters at the art of straddling the line of acceptable behavior, so that they can remain on the network making everyone’s life unpleasant and bringing nothing of value, while still having a passably plausible claim that they “have a right to be here.” It carries the added bonus of creating division between different factions because some people stick up for them. They’ve often figured out that agglomerating onto tribal hot-buttons like veganism or trans rights is a great way to get knee-jerk support from other members, or at least hesitation to be too quick to ban them, so they can continue to overstay their welcome.

That dude is laughing his ass off at all the drama he’s caused.

Dragonfucker strikes again. The number of posts I've seen by him or about him in here is... something

Yeah, I got, I'm guessing perma banned by Ada(?), from there, because I asked to many questions (just one post) about a statement that made no fucking sense to me, on someones post.

Oh! And aggressive disgusting responses back to my questions were way more hateful and vile than anything I've ever posted anywhere, especially directly to another person. Misgendered me, verbal attacks, etc. Went to report that shit, couldn't because of ban. Didn't see those folks banned or their comments removed though. Guess hate speech and violence is ok to them, if your not trans enough for their elite dragon-fucking club.

I'm on the spectrum. I get upset when I can't make sense of shit and DO indeed ask a lot of questions that seem dumb or rude to others. My brain is trying to figure out the rules and meanings of this new idea.... get a grasp of the boundaries.

Thought Blahaj would be a safe place to hang around for an oddball like me, all the inclusitivity talk n shit. Big mistake! Honestly thought about leaving lemmy, think I had more response to that than anything else I've said on here, and it was truly awful to read. Made me question myself and feel really really shitty for not understanding then getting attacked because my questions are to snarky(?), the reason I usually escape TOO here, and rarely respond or post even then. Then my adult brain kicked in and I realize they are a bunch of idiots who think a dragon is real and providing sage advice, and I'll just block that shit. Miss some of those memes though.

I saw this thread very early, didn’t comment though.

Fact is, language doesn’t work by fiat. We already have a genderless pronoun, and it’s the singular they. This has been used at least as far back as Shakespeare.

Let's not go to blahaj, tis a silly place.

We really need to stop complaining about the pronouns shit, the real problem with dragonfucker isn't with the preferred pronouns, it's the fact that dragonfucker is known to harass individuals who call them out on their trolling or sealioning or disagree with them in any way they can't spin as aggressive or hateful.

I was harassed by an alt of this person because I called them out for their behavior when they decided to make a public attack post on me (now deleted) because I preemptively banned their user account and "spouse" account from communities I moderated for trolling, sealioning, and bad faith arguments.

I clarified that politely and reasonably and also properly contacted pawb.social's admins (since the mentions in their comment weren't done properly) and the following response was to create @draconicistransphobc@discuss.online and create !fuckdraconicneo@discuss.online and start spamming it with abusive content attempting to defame, humiliate, intimidate, or even just scare me. That account also sent me porn in my DMs and made rude insults towards me. I was also told to kill myself and also sent death threats, including an invitation for admins to give out my IP address so I could be hunted down and tortured.

I'm almost certain that dragonfucker is the one who did this since it happened immediately after the post which was made on !meta@pawb.social complaining about the bans, and also there were many slip-ups by that account which indicated it was an alt belonging to dragonfucker. Unfortunately beyond that dragonfucker likely did a good job at covering their tracks, or Lemmy just sucks at identifying people, probably both, but I'm confident enough that I'd be willing to bet real money it was dragonfucker, the circumstances are way too suspicious.

Edit:

Here are some of the messages and comment mentions from the alt account mentioned in the post, fair warning, they're not pleasant. Pornographic imagery has been censored.

Gatekeeping whether dragonfucker is a gender is a weird hill to die for. Perhaps equally odd is permabanning for it.

Doesn't bother me. If it did, I'd block them. I actually found the whole thing a rather entertaining spectacle of flavor. I'm a middle age cis white guy. If you want to be called tuba, or tata, or whatever, I don't care. If you use a foreign language like Chinese or Arabic I dislike my own ignorance and inability to understand, but I still respect the person's decision.

Ultimately language rules are only a loose correlation based on use and culture. Rules and norms do not create language or cultures, people do. I only see people resisting the patently unfamiliar. "Dragonfucker" or any other pronoun is no different to me than a nickname. If something so simple is able to make just one person feel a little better about their life for a few moments, I'm happy to oblige. The Hippocratic aphorism "first do no harm" does not appear violated in my opinion. If annoyed, block them.

I think the only neo pronoun I know is xe/xir, even then I don't know why you would use it above they/them

I think modlog could be that unique fediverse content genre.

So much potential!

I kinda get it, though. It's not easy to draw a line and say this is valid and that is not because you dislike the person or the person is a troll or whatnot, and I'm not specifically talking about drag. Like it doesn't make it ok to call people racial epithets if they're a criminal. So how do you tell which pronouns are valid and which aren't? The conclusion over there is you don't. And I would be really uncomfortable going into a minority space and telling people they're being gay in the wrong way or telling somebody they're reacting to racism in the wrong way or they're not passing or bisexuals aren't valid or whatever else. I get that it may feel heavy handed, but this is the kind of discussion that happens over and over in bad faith. So how do you tell who's having a conversation in good faith or bad faith? Once again, the conclusion seems to be one doesn't and to err on the side of safety for the users of that instance. Bad money drives out good and that's not necessarily your fault, but the coin is worth less regardless of if it's shaved or not.

I mean, if I were somebody who wanted to make the resistance against the nazis weak, this is exactly the kind of bullshit I might think to do. I'm not saying that's why this is going on. Just that there's no reason to rule it out.

Getting banned on blahaj or hexbear is a good sign that you're still sane tbh.

Never would I read this.

Sorry, Hate me but if peoples are having and not hurting anyone. I wouldn't care. Yeah, Dragonfucker have confusing pronoun and I am not even native english speaker. That's why I avoid talking to Dragonfucker if I accidentally mispronounced then everyone will think I am homophobe?

But "They" is gender nuetral term.

A whole thread talking about @dragonfucker@lemmy.nz brodie must be geekin reading all this😂

Yeah, if we could also convince Track_Shovel to stop posting to 196, that would be great.

I agree with the mods on this one. You don't go into people's spaces and tell them they're living wrong unless they're actively hurting other people. And at the end of the day, using a different word as a pronoun isn't going to hurt you. Heck if you have an app you can just tag them with it.

https://youtu.be/Obagb7RQeYo

play both sides to win

@Flatworm7591@lemmy.dbzer0.com why is this post still open when you locked the other one? Seems strange to me, both are equally contentious and have devolved into mostly a slap-fight. PugJesus has stated he wants to leave Blahaj but is still causing drama here over this whole affair, instead of moving on with his life.

admin makes a post saying they will enforce the rules around banning people who refuse to use neo pronouns, in a meta community for trans people, and every cis loser has to jump in and play the victim when they get banned for breaking the rules in the post was made to say the rules would be enforced. cry harder.

Please refer to my comment on this related post: https://lemmy.dbzer0.com/post/34327347/15649022

This is twords everyone, not specifically pug,
I really don't understand how this is so hard for people. If calling someone a hippopotamus makes them happy and doesn't inconvenience me then you bet your ass I'll be saying hippopotamus. Seems insane to all get so worked up over something that has no negative impact other than making you not mindlessly say 'they'. Literally just accept it, or block. Downvoting about it every time you see drag isnt gonna fix anything. That's harassment, and harassment ain't cool.
Never thought that would be controversial on Lemmy.

I just really think people have lost their ability to see that someone else is on the other side of the computer screen. As the bumper sticker that got mega upvoted goes, "trans people existing does literally nothing negative to your life"

You don't even have to respect drags opinions either! You can just treat drag like any other person who has a lot of bad takes (excluding gender). My upvote ratio is literally 36 up 32 down, but I'll still do something as simple as writing 'drag' instead of 'they' to make the person on the other side of my computer screen just a little bit happier.

Happy new years, btw.

YDI

And apparently, also when you think that 'They' is a perfectly serviceable gender-neutral singular pronoun, but are willing to use other pronouns if asked to.

The first image in the post body, your comment that got removed, says the complete opposite.

It's not up to you, or anyone else, to label someone's use of pronouns as trolling. If you think they are, block them, and move on. If you have solid proof that they have I'll intent, report them, block them, and move on. I don't know why you're surprised that a trans safe space is removing comments and banning people for vigilante misgendering.

YDI.

gatekeeping sure is when you tell someone their gender isn’t real. especially under a post that specifically says “hey don’t tell people their gender isn’t real.”

edit: removing my comments below because the discussion is no longer about respecting trans identities and is just a slapfight. fuck transphobes and get over yourselves on a single tiny user who you should have blocked months ago if you actually had a problem.

Fuck blahaj! All my homies hate blahaj🗣️🔥

i love drag, and i don’t think about drag half as much as all the weird fuckers who get SO worked up about drag all the fucken time

lol. There's someone getting banned for standing up to a pedophile and here you are whining about someone having a preferred way to be called.