lol

Horrific, I fled the US a few weeks ago and things are getting worse here as well. I'm surrounded exclusively by transphobic far-right cishet white men. I was sent to an all boys school and it sucks here. Some new kid showed up who loudly declared that "Muslims don't deserve rights", the school administration is requiring I respect his opinion because apparently his opinion is respectable. Meanwhile all of my viewpoints are shut down as extremist (even when all I say is that dehumanizing and othering people is bad). I hate this country, I hate these people, and I hate this dark cruel world I live in.

Well, I'm riding out post-election (nausea? Lack of appetite?) into better dietary choices (significantly less carbs/sugars) it it feels like it's going well. About to mix up marinade for a whole bunch of chicken to bake to snack on instead of carbs.

Going through my things and getting rid of stuff I don't use to reduce how much stuff I have. Make myself lighter to move when the time comes.

Paying off anything I can now; phone is payed off, need to pay someone to take the crap i can't move in my storage unit (that I bought on the stupid whims of 18 year old me.) Still got like 8K in credit cards (I'm a dumbass for that; spent way too much eating out for like 3 years and a couple years of doordash ordering before that) and like 5K on my car

Switched to Linux, not going back this time even if gaming performance might be better. Planning to get an unlocked Pixel to put grapheneOS on for better security in the next payday or two. Need to set up VPN and assess all my logins/accounts (got Proton membership to start de-google-ing)

Going to spend the foreseeable future better educating myself to get a better paying (non-government, fully remote) job. My math skills are atrocious, I should learn more than extremely basic Excel skills, need to master powershell and maybe learn Python. I'd like to get enterprise-server-level experience but that's heavily silo'd in my current field.

I.

WANT

OUT.

I've spent a lot of the week crying. My heart is truly broken for my fellow trans people in the US who no longer feel safe. I feel like things here in the UK will not be so far behind in another five years or so.

uhhhmm uhhmm yeahh,,,,,,, has totally been going great,,,, no existential dread or anything :3

I joined a local leftist organization

I'm angry, and I'm motivated to start helping people prepare for what's coming by building connections and trying to get lgbtq folks to safe states.

I always used to think that moisturizer was kind of a scam. I'm sorry, and I take it all back.

My skin is turning into tissue paper! (And looking niiice <3) It's soaking up pretty much anything I can throw at it. Now if I can just grow my hair a bit longer and shed those last 15kg or so...

I really need to learn a healthy coping mechanism, I'm getting a bit sick of crying every night and ruining my physical health in response (not self harm, it's complicated)...

Other than that, preparing for a high chance of being arrested because the NSW supreme court thinks it's okay to erode our right to protest. I'm slightly scared I'll have no accommodation and have to sleep rough for a week or so due to other permits not being approved, but I'm sure I'll manage, urban camping is always an option.

Got my parents on board to make some donations to help out those in the states get to safety, so that's some good news.

I hvae iced cream

I decided my resting heart rate wasn’t high enough from stress and decided to get my COVID and flu vaccines this weekend. I feel tired and icky, but it’ll be worth it.

Everyone take care of yourselves, you are important 🫶🩷🩵🤍

Had my first transphobia the other day, that was fun /s. Came out to a (now former) friend and he went on about how he was glad trump won and that it should be even harder to transition and teachers shouldn't be allowed to mention any lgbt topics whatsoever. He knows transitioning reduces suicide rates too so it was hard not to take that as him telling me to kms. Had a look on his face like he thought it was funny. In better news though my mum has offered to try getting prescribed estradiol "for menopause" so that's gonna make medicating easier while I'm waiting to be seen by a doctor

I got my new red hair and I'm loving it. ;-) ( picture available on request )

Also went to Busch Gardens this past Saturday. It was alot of fun. Went with my gf, gf's Mom, and gf's sister. Seemingly went fine...? Idk if I pass or if they just don't mind...

I also saw my endocrin on Monday. We're waiting on test results. But depending on how that goes I might get an increased dose of E ;-)