Holding grudges

Seriously. I don't have the energy to keep track of that shit. If somebody was shitty to me they just get labeled as "not friend" and get treated like an acquaintance. Anything more requires me to care about them in some way, and I have shit to do.
- If you're a work friend/acquaintance, yeah who gives a flying.
  Now, the top ten "anime betrayal"s, those are the one's that hurt/stick with me.
  
  Yeah it's easy to just drop people when they're not really a part of your life. Not so when you've been building a relationship for several years.

It bothers me to an absurdely strong degree that random words are capitalized.
- Not random. They are capitalizing words for emphasis, similarly to if they said it as big of me or hold grudges — using title case like that also makes it seem like it's a sort of monolithic idea worthy of a formal noun, like Always remember to Brush Your Teeth!
  
  Even then...those are weird parts of the sentence to emphasize.
- Yeah, it's weird but not as weird when you notice that only the keywords have the first letters capitalized.

I only hold one single grudge in my life. The one fucker in high-school who took the accountant role when my mother died of cancer, took the money my class raised for my family, and spent them on luxury stuff for himself.
- ...Please tell me something happened to him in legal terms.
  
  Haha no... However they got hit by "divine justice" The same day they bought these, they got hit in the street by a motorcycle and ended up in the hospital.

Mine is a fun sort of specific. Years later, I'll remember that I hate a person's guts but will completely forget why I hate them. But that visceral hate stays with me.
I recently had a conversation with my ex-fiancée of 15 years and she was apologizing for things I didn't even remember her doing. But I remember the bitterness from those things.
- People will forget what you do, forget what you say, but they'll never forget how your make them feel.
  (Butchered from Maya Angelou)

I was featured in a story told by someone at a funeral regarding some disagreement/fight I and the deceased had.
Don't remember it at all, nothing about it even rang a bell.

I guess I'm different. If you burn me enough to illicit disgust, I will remember that over all else and I only forgive if deserving. I've had to many people take advantage of me. I don't hold grudges, I identify if you are a positive or negative effect on my life and treat accordingly.

Most of the time when I'm replying to posts I'm doubting if what I'm typing is related at all to the post because I forgor what it's about as soon as I'm at the comment box and I just hope nobody notices when/if I'm typing pure bullshit.
My memory is such shit but I guess for stuff between me and my best friend I used to have it did help that I was never able to hold a grudge. I learned apologizing real quick and the last few arguments we had I apologized to her within a minute or two of starting the argument because I didn't want to lose her anymore (though we used to always come back to each other sooner or later anyways). Not the last one we had though, I miss her with every last piece of my heart 💔.
So much time.

Wait, bad memory is a sign of ADHD?
- As someone with adhd let me also tell you one of my favorite internet quotes of all time:
  Every pees too but if you’re peeing 60 times a day that’s when you see a doctor
- Ye
- I mean that's a lot of things and also can be normal. Don't tik tok yourself a diagnosis considering even different psychs will come up with different conclusions. I'm dealing with that now trying to get a diagnosis one says def adhd the other thinks bipolar... another depression. They just pick something. There's like no science behind psychology I swear.

When you have OCD and ADHD so you hold onto the grudge because what if you forget??????

Meanwhile there are people that I have literally had a grudge against for decades. All they have to do to get themselves off the shitlist is to not be cunts to everyone around them. That's literally it. Except Connie. I want an apology for what you did.

That's why you need to read Building A Second Brain by Tiago Forte. Then you can just have you Little Black Book in the cloud so you never forget.

- ADHD doesn't make us aliens. It makes a lot of those human quirks more frequent and worse in scale compared to what neurotypical people experience. I'm tired of neurotypicals that are trying to invalidate our struggles because "everyone's like that, you're just overreacting".

I tend not to hold grudges because I don't see the point of holding anger. If someone wrongs me I might increase the distance between us socially or not trust them with certain things if I feel it would be unwise to continue. Sometimes there needs to be some kind of reconciliation for things to be close again. I've definitely stopped being friends with people for reasons that were unlikely to change or where it wasn't worth continuing, but it's very hard for me to stay mad at them or wish them ill. Even the people who've done awful things to me or who are now contemptible in many respects, I just kind of hope they do better in the future, far away from me.
I've never considered this to have anything to do with my adhd, but maybe? It would definitely be something more complicated than just forgetting though.