Calling out of work

As an employer I would be concerned that my employees aren't bright enough to lie to me properly.
- And that their professionalism is so low they're comfortable dropping f bombs in texts right after lying.
  
  Eh, depends on how the boss is.
  Like, I drop f-bombs in front of one of my bosses, but would never in front of the other.
  
  Do you work in a church? In the real world, most adults are absolutely fine with profanity. This isn't a professional email to corporate or a circular meant for the general public, it's a text to a direct boss. "Fuck" isn't outside established decorum here.

Pro tip, your hot water tap probably gets to like 120, you can mix it with cold to get 100-103 pretty easily.
- Pro tip: any company that requires you to prove that you are “sick” in order to get a day off is a shitty company. Find another job.
  
  Yea we can call out 8x before getting fired. It doesn't matter the reason. I still have people calling in leaving messages with exaggerated symptoms in their voice and it's like.. Bruh I don't give a shit just don't do it 7 more times so I don't have to fire you.
  
  Exactly. I just text my office manager that I’m sick and will see them in a couple days, and they take care of the rest. Fuck companies that make you get a notarized letter from the CDC or whatever bullshit.
- Nah, better just send a pic with 120°
  !Bonus points if that's °C!<
  
  Reply would be: ”You dead yet?”
- Pro tip even just cracking 100 isn't really a fever, do something like 101.2 that's a fever, but not high enough to seek medical attention just yet, so there's no having to go to the hospital. A fever of 103 is something you need to checked out urgently to immediately
  
  It depends on the person. One of my kids goes to 104 every time she gets a fever. It scared the crap out of me the first time but now I know to expect it.

Pretty much any smartphone can easily crop images. This is very likely fake.
- You'd think, but the amount of people who "save" pictures on their phones by taking a screenshot that they then don't ever crop, is disturbing.
  
  The amount of people who save images by screenshotting them instead of downloading the image is also disturbing.
  
  I mean, even if the number was in the hundreds of thousands, I don't really find it all that disturbing.
  
  Tumblr posts are like screenshots from a phone in scroll mode for an entire text book's worth of comments.
- It probably is fake given the response, but I think you underestimate just how stupid people can be.
  I have a vendor who takes our simple web form that would remember past inputs to make it easy on them when they use it, but instead prints it out, writes the answers on it with a pen, and faxes it back.
  Every. Single. Time.
  
  As someone who doesn't have to work with that person, this is hilarious
- Someone would do that? Just go on the internet and lie?
  
  No, impossible
- Ah but you see, someone like me would absolutely just forget to crop the picture before sending. Granted, there aren't many people as dull as me. I'm one of a kind 😊
  Not saying it isn't fake tho, who am I kidding? This is the internet.
  
  Usually when you crop a picture, it saves a copy, so it's at least plausible that this person could have made that mistake.

It's dystopian that so many people don't have unlimited sick time.
- Disagree. Any form of "unlimited" time off gets heavy scrutiny. I'd rather have a generous PTO policy than an unlimited one.
  That said, it's distopian that anyone needs to send proof of being sick. That's a symptom of a really toxic work culture.
  
  Maybe I've been lucky but in 10+ years of unlimited sick time, I've never been questioned about sick days.
  Vacation time I think needs a minimum if you're going to do unlimited, otherwise people aren't sure what to take and may take less.
  The worst policy I ever worked under was "limited sick days. Unused sick days get paid out as a bonus at the end of the year". So everyone came in sick to get that sweet two weeks pay at the end of the year.
  
  Right. Those with unlimited PTO take off only what they need, and not the strict number they get. Those with a set amount end up finding time to take off. It’s why companies moved over to “unlimited”. That, and the fact they don’t need to pay out your vacation when you leave.
- Unlimited? F'realz?
  
  Don't know where you live but in the Netherlands you just stay home when you're sick, that's it.
  I believe after two weeks you need a doctor's note.
  And then you'll get paid for up to two years of illness, after which you can apply with the government for further assistance.
  So not unlimited, but quite long still.
  https://www.rijksoverheid.nl/onderwerpen/ziekteverzuim-van-het-werk/regels-en-verplichtingen-bij-ziekte
  
  I've had unlimited sick time via "if you're not well stay home" for like ten years. One job had limited vacation time (15 days to start that went up to 25 as you gained seniority), but the others has unlimited vacation time, too.
  These have been small/medium startups.
- Very much unrelated to this post

I thought it read 100°C lol
- Lol "Sorry, I can't come in today, I'm boiling into vapour."

See u in 10.
Does this mean they have a 10 minute commute? I'm kinda jealous lol.
- I had a 10 minute commute at my last job. It was definitely great, but it was also only reachable by car because almost the entire 10 minutes was highway driving and my job was in an industrial park that was only accessible from the highway, so it was car or nothing.
- I used to live right across the street from my work. In fact, my apartment was closer than the parking lot, so I would be sitting on my couch before most of my coworkers even made it to their cars.

- That would be if that temperature was in Celsius, luckily it's freedom units...

I still don't know how I did it, but when I'd fake sick as a child my mom would leave the room for a bit while the thermometer stuck in my mouth, beneath my tongue. I would then breath the "hottest" air I could muster repeatedly from my lungs, believing that it would bring the thermometer up to fever levels... and it always worked.
Did I just have a really chill mom who recognized when I didn't want to go? Or could this absurd method actually trick a traditional thermometer into going up?
Maybe it's best that I don't know, as I have a daughter now and it's important to have her back when she needs needs a fuckin' day.
- Maybe got enough convective heat transfer

screenshot vs save as