Mike Johnson elected House speaker with broad GOP support

Since I've never heard of him, here are some of Mike Johnson's political stances. In favor of:
A nationwide abortion ban.
A nationwide ban on gay marriage.
Heavy restrictions on medical marijuana prescriptions and a ban on recreational marijuana.
Ending military aid to Ukraine.
Gay conversion therapy.
Federal law against gender affirming care for those under 18.
Eliminating funding for immigration and refugee assistance.
Trump's Muslim ban.
A federal version of Florida's "Don't Say Gay" bill.
Prayer in public schools.
Laws making divorce more difficult.
Johnson does not believe in climate change or that Biden legitimately won the 2020 election. He is a young earth creationist believing the Earth was created between 6-10k years ago. He regularly takes his family hunting or to the gun range. He basically checks every box of a christofascist.
The only good thing I can see about him is that Johnson adopted a black 14 year old boy and raised him. Of course he used this adoption as justification for being against reparations and the adopted son can it be found in any public family photos with Johnson. Any speculation that the adopted boy doesn't exist or was Johnson's sexual plaything is completely unfounded.
- Given every election that’s happened since 2016, this is exactly what every single Democratic candidate needs to hang around the neck of every single Republican. No more blue state moderate republicans. Link them all to 100% supporting a national abortion ban, outlawing marriage equality, and forced Christian prayers in public schools. Anti-civil rights, pro-child endangerment. Every single market should get this message, and it should be clear and consistent across the country.
  
  It isn't enough to just argue that people shouldn't vote for Republicans. Being the least worst option won't work. We need to talk about why they should vote for Democrats. We need to convince people that their own personal lives will be tangibly better under Democrats. We need to make people more able to afford housing and food. Union support. Raising the minimum wage. Legislation restricting corporate renters. Legal actions on companies inflating their profits and blaming the pandemic. We need to make people believe that we are on their side against the people who are fucking them.
  
  Judging by every election that has been held since Roe v. Wade was overturned, it looks like this is actually happening.
- Seems like moderate Republicans weren't objecting to an extremist (ala Jim Jordan). They were objecting to an extremist who had too much of a public profile. They just needed someone obscure enough that they wouldn't catch too much flak for choosing them.
  
  Thats the trick, there never were moderate republicans.
- We already knew he was a Republican.
- A nationwide abortion ban.
  A nationwide ban on gay marriage.
  Lol. Lmao even.
  I would like to thank Republicans for the constant advertisement they provide for Democrats. 2022 will look like a blowout for Republicans compared to 2024 if they push legislation for this.
  
  According to Pew polls, 37% of Americans have a negative view of the impact of gay marriage being legal. 37% of Americans also say abortion should be illegal in all or most cases. That is way too many that vote cause too often for my liking.
- Any speculation that the adopted boy doesn't exist or was Johnson's sexual plaything is completely unfounded.
  That’s poppycock and slanderous. The Babylon Bee printed a retraction weeks ago.
  
  You mean it's poppycock and slanderous that the speculation is unfounded? Got it. It also explains why none of you are naming the unfortunate child victim.
- Tldr basically Hitler. Canada seems like a nice place. If they actually implement any of those things that effect me, I'm fucking out. This guy is far more evil than Trump.
  
  They tried so hard to get rid of Obamacare and that was more unpopular than any of these ideas would be. If Democrats make sure the public knows what kind of monsters are running the GOP, then we have a chance at sweeping the next election.
- Do we have a list of Republicans who voted for him?
  
  Literally all of them did.
- Those all sound like "small government" things to me.

Sure would be nice to have a functional, sane, and reality based conservative party in the US, not this circus sideshow they call the Republican party.
- The Democratic Party is the Conservative Party. Republicans are far right of that.
  
  Yes, we have a conservative party and a fascist party.
- You know, I was thinking the same thing. Like sure, I'm not for Republicans, but if they could at least get someone who actually cares about what it means at the core to be a Republican and work for the people and want small Gov, then sure. But here we are yet again, they continue to be an embarrassment. That party is a joke and has been for some time now
  
  Your problem is assuming this
  someone who actually cares about what it means at the core to be a Republican
  and this
  work for the people and want small Gov
  are synonymous.
- Republicans exemplify conservatism. They want to go back to subjugating women and minorities, killing gays, and maintaining power with a ruling class. You know, tradition.
- What's funny is that the Democrats would be a very right-wing party in almost any other established democracy. Republicans would basically be the fascist party everywhere else (well America too, I guess).
- You have that. The Conservative party in the USA is the Democrats. The fascist party is the Republicans.
- If you were functional, sane, and based in reality then you wouldn't have any conservative beliefs. It's a political ideology by and for idiots and zealots.
- The DNC just got the sitting President of the United States to not file to put his name on the New Hampshire primary ballot, immediately after sending 50 billion dollars to fund the genocide of Palestine.
  I dont disagree with you, but I think you should stop using words like "Republican" and "Democrat" and just speak in terms of "The Party", because they are all the same damn organization and all of them are astoundingly stupid and incompetent
  
  I call them the Corporate Party, because that's who they serve

He’s a fucking worthless traitor.

The only supporting evidence in this article, as to why the GOP, elected Johnson:
“I think he’s gonna be a fantastic speaker,” Trump said Wednesday at the New York courthouse where the former president, who is now the Republican front-runner for president in 2024, is on trial over a lawsuit alleging business fraud.
- From here:
  https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/oct/25/who-is-mike-johnson-republican-2020-election
  "Johnson served on Donald Trump’s legal defense team during his first impeachment."
  and:
  "He played a key role in assisting Trump’s efforts to overturn the election, the New York Times reported last year. When Texas filed a lawsuit at the US supreme court asking the justices to set aside valid electoral votes from Wisconsin, Michigan, Pennsylvania and Arizona, he organized a friend-of-the-court brief in support and got 125 of his House Republican colleagues to sign on."

Election denier.

I was looking forward to a couple more days of getting popcorn and watching this shit show. Oh well.
- TBF, I'm looking forward to unpinning the MegaPost. :)
  
  That's fair, lol.

He got all 220 Republicans to vote for him.
- I read another article that says this guy got the job because he has the fewest enemies willing to torpedo his candidacy in the Caucus.
  
  Smart people, a lot of people, frankly are saying this guy got the job because he sucked Trump's dick.
  
  To paraphrase how someone some GOP Representative apparently described it:
  "We have to find someone smart enough to get the votes and stupid enough to want the job".

Bought a fresh head of lettuce for the occasion.
The history of the romaine empire is so interesting.
- I love it so much I need to share the context for those who don't know.
  Last year, there was a mix up in UK conservative leadership, and on 6 September 2022 Liz Truss became Prime Minister.
  On 14 October 2022, The Star (a British tabloid) began live-streaming a head of iceberg lettuce in response to an article from The Economist which stated Truss' tenure as Prime Minister had "the shelf life of a lettuce."
  Despite many MANY interviews boldly stating "I am not a quitter", Truss resigned on 20 October 2022. Obviously the lettuce had not yet even begun to wilt.
  Since then, she has shared in interviews that it was humiliating to be compared to a lettuce.
  She has also been back in the news recently. After a long hiatus, she came back to UK government to push a budget, which passed, and promptly tanked the UK economy even further than it has already been tanked in near-to-moderate history by Brexit.
  
  Where is everyone finding month-long lettuce? I get lettuce from the grocer and from my CSA. Fridge and sometimes with their root/stem in a bit of water and it wilts in days. Maybe I should just be leaving it on the counter...
  
  The Economist really does have a way with words sometimes. So many news agencies are "just the facts," but The Economist loves to mix in creative headlines and word play like that.

His biography touts his "20 years successfully litigating high profile constitutional law cases in district and appellate courts nationwide and is widely recognized as a leading defender of the right to life, religious liberty, free speech, the Second Amendment and free market principles.
Oh boy. This guy is already looking like a real loser.
HR5636 Protect Children’s Innocence Act A BILL To amend chapter 110 of title 18, United States Code, to prohibit gender affirming care on minors.
HJRes45 JOINT RESOLUTION Providing for congressional disapproval under chapter 8 of title 5, United States Code, of the rule submitted by the Department of Education relating to ‘‘Waivers and Modifications of Federal Student Loans’’. Vetoed
HR7 No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion and Abortion Insurance Full Disclosure Act of 2023 A BILL To prohibit taxpayer funded abortions.
HR82 Social Security Fairness Act of 2023 A BILL To amend title II of the Social Security Act to repeal the Government pension offset and windfall elimination provisions.
HR356 Unleashing American Energy Act A BILL To require the Secretary of the Interior to conduct a minimum number of oil and gas lease sales in certain areas, to prevent delays in oil and gas leasing, and for other purposes.
HR1010 Prohibiting IRS Financial Surveillance Act A BILL To prohibit the implementation of new requirements to report bank account deposits and withdrawals.

"Insurrectionist traitors vote in favor of fellow insurrectionist traitor, because they all support insurrection, treason."

Horrifying

Who the fuck is this ass clown?
- Just another terrorist traitor

Insurrectionist

Yay! Fascism!

Wow I didn't expect to see this so soon, I thought they'd do at least another dozen more votes or something.

Mike Johnson? No no, I vote we get Mike Jones, you can call him at 281-330-8004 and see if he wants the job.

This is the best summary I could come up with:
WASHINGTON (AP) — Republicans eagerly elected Rep. Mike Johnson as House speaker Wednesday, elevating a deeply conservative but lesser-known leader to the seat of U.S. power and ending for now the political chaos in their majority.
But when GOP Conference Chair Rep. Elise Stefanik rose to introduce Johnson’s name Wednesday as their nominee, Republicans jumped to their feet for an extended standing ovation.
Democrats again nominated their leader Rep. Hakeem Jeffries of New York, criticizing Johnson as an architect of Trump’s legal effort to overturn the 2020 presidential election he lost.
The federal government risks a shutdown in a matter of weeks if Congress fails to pass funding legislation by a Nov. 17 deadline to keep services and offices running.
More immediately, President Joe Biden has asked Congress to provide $105 billion in aid — to help Israel and Ukraine amid their wars and to shore up the U.S. border with Mexico.
Many hard-liners have been resisting a leader who voted for the budget deal that McCarthy struck with Biden earlier this year, which set federal spending levels that far-right Republicans don’t agree with and now want to undo.
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