Worst spy ever

I shit you not, this has gotten me out of trouble dozens of times. Any time I get pulled over I pull out the "golly jeez" and "oh dang" and proceed to talk the cop's ear off about the fine minutia of my incredibly boring day.

Once got pulled over in a tiny town at 3am in a boaty cadillac with a dope sticker on the back windshield. Watched the cop go from "drug bust of the century" to "please don't let anyone see me here" in about 4min. Literally watched the man's will to live leave his body when I started taking about d&d.

Are you an energy vampire?
- Like "What we do in the shadows" series? That's exactly who I thought of too.
Literally watched the man’s will to live leave his body when I started taking about d&d.
He's probably old school and plays or 3rd edition rules. He just couldn't stand hearing you blaspheme his game.
- If it ain't got THAC0, it ain't D&D.
- Dont talk to cops, unless you can make it a kind of torture?
How do you do this?
- Spend a year working in a retirement home. Then mirror that energy and just commit wholly to the bit.
Literally watched the man's will to live leave his body when I started taking about d&d.
WHAT THE FUCK I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO DID THIS LMAO

I read this all through the voice of Sterling Archer. Highly recommend

Honestly, a lot of things are improved by H. John Benjamin's voice lol
- Also Diedrich Bader.

This is basically just a set of scenes that I would fully believe took place in Archer if I hadn't seen this post.

Hahaha holy shit I thought the same exact thing. I need to rewatch those soon. Been a few years. Are they making them still?
- Abruptly cancelled at the end of season 14, talks of a revival are happening but tbd

[off topic]

I can't remember the author or title of the story.

Napoleon wants to give his enemies false information, so he picks a courier who looks bold and dashing, but has a reputation for being a complete fuck up.

The idiot manages to fumble his way past a dozen patrols and deliver the orders.

Exactly what they didn't want.

Welcome to ADHD guys

Lol I thought that's where I was

Tbh, I read that there were multiple Stasi Agents faking exactly that type of personality. If you can't keep a secret besides that one important secret... Everyone will think you can't keep a secret. ... which means you couldn't be a spy.

this.... seems like ADHD.

Vibes based spying

Chunk: And this I've time, I mixed up a batch of fake barf, snuck up to the balcony at the theater, and made a noise like "huuuuh, huuuuh" and dumped it over the side.

Fratelli: I think I'm beginning to like this kid, ma.

Me, an empath: Uh huh. Uhhuh. puts a keyboard down in front of them so they unconsciously input their password while telling me about Severance

New bames john movie

I feel attacked.