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118 comments

  • Yeah, it's sick. No man should be expected to be able to provide for a small to large family alone, not in this capitalist society that is designed to grind you into nothing. They should be allowed to enjoy hobbies like cooking, art, and home making. They should be allowed to give and recieve affection. The normal gender roles we were taught are trash. They are not meant for everyone but only for some class of people that existed at one point in time and that even then they were unique in the amount of wealth they all shared.

  • A long-term study in the US involving around 10,000 young men has already shown that they are more likely to commit suicide over a period of 20 years if they identify strongly with traditional masculine roles. These norms are characterized by ideas that originated from the previously strongly patriarchal social framework. They prescribe the characteristics that men should have and how they should behave. These include, for example, independence, controlling their emotions and not showing their vulnerability. In science, this is summarized under the term traditional masculine ideologies.

    Toxic Masculinity is very real.

    The Woke is trying to prevent REAL men from exercising their right to unalive themselves!

  • There is no non-traditional gender role for a man to assume. A man who does not work and provide, protect and defend is shamed as a deadbeat. His is the only end of the old social contract no one wants to throw away.

    • Of course they're shamed as long as people who demand gender role adherence exist. Even if these conservatives were a small minority it would still technically be true that incompletely traditional men would be shamed. Shamed by them.

      It is still true that any man that tries to meet their demands is more likely to commit suicide than s man eho rejects their demands and ignores them.

      I'm sure you're not wrong in arguing there's no non-traditional gender role men can fulfill that is clearly defined and understood like the traditional one is. But that's part of the rejection. You reject the role, you keep living, if necessary you leave the people who make your life insufferable. Or you just stay, while shutting them out or reducing contact. Often that means not being welcoming to cruel family members, and often it means not listening to your mother and father most of the time.

      • But that’s part of the rejection.

        Why! 👏 Are! 👏 We! 👏 Rejecting! 👏 Norms! 👏 In! 👏 The! 👏 First! 👏 Place?!

        You're talking like a young feminist, one who has had a bank account since she was a teenager and has never actually lived in a world where she isn't allowed to do anything her brother is. Feminists have or had a reason for rejecting traditional gender norms, but now treat rejection of traditional gender roles as "it's what we do." Foregone conclusion.

        Men don't have a reason to reject traditional gender norms and in fact have reasons not to. Chiefly: Survival. Men are the way they are because they have to be. Men are treated VERY poorly if they show any emotions. Anger is the only one he is sometimes allowed because just what the non-consentual fuck are you going to DO about it? That's what I thought. It is sometimes possible to make people afraid of you in useful ways, to some young men it is the only source of genuine power they have. Any displays of vulnerability are an immediate invite to attack. People love kicking a man when he's down. You can probably count any overt displays of joy or contentedness; people love ruining a man's day. So you learn to swallow it all. If you can still walk, you're fine. According to them, according to you, according to all. That's the end of it.

        if necessary you leave the people who make your life insufferable.

        Great plan there! Abandon every survival tactic you've ever known and if any of the few actual allies in your life bitch about it abandon them too. Wander out into the world disarmed and entirely alone for...some fucking reason you've yet to elaborate upon.

        "Traditional men commit suicide, weren't you listening?" Causation or correlation? Does the act of being a manly man make one suicidal, or is it the growing expectation from society to continue to be more and more productive while pay stagnates, costs skyrocket, social contracts are broken and support structures are torn down all systematically and seemingly out of pure spite. So he either burns the village to feel its warmth or just pops his own cork.

        ======

        I'll point out one other thing: when a gay man comes out of the closet, when an atheist speaks up, when a woman goes to work, when an OK Go fan takes his headphones off, the thing they all have in common is "This is who I truly am, and that's what I'm going to be now." That's not what's happening among men. The energy you're bringing here is "have you tried...not being trans?"

    • Yeah and any woman who doesn't cook, clean and pop out children is shamed as selfish. Hmm wait, that's the definition of traditional gender roles and the topic of the article / study, interesting. Guess there's no alternatives to that for women either. It's not like a man can't just be themselves and content with that.

  • Fuck I just typed out such a long and thoughtful response. It was the perfect balance of addressing all the misconceptions in the comments and giving my opinion on the actual issue without at all relating anything women vs man.

    My finger slipped and I hit the back button on jeboa and I lost the whole comment. I'm really feeling the traditional masculine urge to express anger and engage in risky behavior.

118 comments