Cursing is when you use edgy filler words instead of saying something meaningful.
There're better words to use in any situation.
To make the point more clear. As much as people tend to use it in the way they do for words such as 'like'.
I mean people will just say f you, instead of thinking of a witty insult or express an emotion with more expression.
For example, say you want to express that a person is fat, which one is a more cutting way to tell someone they're fat:
"You're a fat-f**k."
"Don't bother trying to stand up. I know you haven't done that in years."
One more thing, As much as there is a time and place you don't curse, it's not a matter of "appropriateness" to me; what matters more is the impact of what's said. I hope my example showcases that.
One last thing, - cause I just starting to realise this matter more to people than I thought it would (nothing wrong with that of course) - cursing doesn't necessarily subtract from a remark as if it's a negative number in a math problem, it's just redundant for speaking (more often than not).
Someone saying "I'm tired of this fucking rain" is more boring than someone saying "I really wish thor would give us a warning before bukkakeing the world".
I just realise this will work as a post in a unpopular opinion space if that exist, lol.
In what way does it add emotion? I've heard people say "f you" to mean all different kinds of emotions. I find it hard to believe that saying "I'm f-ing sad" is more emotional than taking time to think it though and get something such as this "I think losing a family member would hurt less than what I'm feeling right now."
"I haven't eaten in 4 hours and 41 minutes and now long for a sandwich with cheese, tomatoes and lettuce" also gets more info across than saying "I'm hungry", yet people keep using the latter.
Scientific studies have shown that curse words relieve physical pain better than any alternatives.
So there are some situations where anything else is an objectively worse option.
ETA: I'm willing to bet the reason this is being downvoted is due to the holier-than-thou attitude you're copping, OP. It's also something of a classist-coded cliché to claim that people who curse lack vocabulary, intelligence, education, or creativity. This is, of course counter to the fact that studies have shown that people with higher intelligence are more likely to use salty language.
I guess don't know how to break it to you that saying "f you" is not creative without being on a high horse then.
Also, speaking of cope. To say that a person using curse words instead of a witty remark is somehow smart cause smart people use curse words doesn't sound right but I don't how else to interpret the ETA you made.
Much of the time communication isn't about being creative or coming off smart. It's about effectively conveying meaning with the tools you have. Sometimes that means simple, crude language is more effective at conveying something than all the wit in the world.
So when I'm in a situation that calls for its use, I don't care that "fuck off" is a dime-a-dozen phrase that doesn't make sense. It's never misunderstood, it's cathartic to say, and I don't need to think on the spot to figure out something more eloquent - my mind is on, y'know, who or what needs to fuck off instead.
I guess don't know how to break it to you that saying "f you" is not creative without being on a high horse then.
I give you a decent counterargument with some bonus alliteration and all you can muster is a strawman?
Also, speaking of cope. To say that a person using curse words instead of a witty remark is somehow smart cause smart people use curse words doesn't sound right but I don't how else to interpret the ETA you made.
You've reversed cause and effect here. I didn't say that all people who curse are smart. I said smart people curse.
You've argued from a cliché and from a strawman misrepresentation of my original point. I hope someday you look back and cringe at your small-minded pretentiousness in this thread.
What I'm seeing here is someone who REALLY likes witty quips, but is very upset that nobody else appreciates them.
I'm with you, buddy. None of my snappy responses ever convinced a bully that I was worthy of respect, but his constant repetition of movie quotes always got a chuckle from his cronies.
Smart people know big words, but smarter people know when to use them. Making an impression on others isn't about proving that you have higher value than someone else, it's about proving that you are one of them. Reminding people that you're different from them pushes you away.
Or, I might just be projecting shit I've been through. Maybe it's useful to someone.
I agree that cursing is often used as a replacement for "um". But you ever really appreciate someone who knows how and when to curse, with intention and as an infliction? It's a joy to behold.
What are you? 13? Just let people use whatever words they want. You might think that there is a "better alternative for any situstion" but sometimes nothing like a good "fuck you" drives the point home. It expresses hate in such a simple way without trying to be performative or witty. Also you can say fuck, we aren't in the middle school courtyard for god's sake
I agree to an extent. If overused, cursing can be "edgy" and offputting. However, sometimes you just need to emphasize the emotion of a given statement that mere "polite" words cannot express.
Quite frankly, I do not trust people that do not curse. I feel that they are not emotionally genuine. Conversely, I feel that people that curse too much are emotionally immature and do not know how to express themselves properly. Cursing is an art. It's a linguistic balancing act where one must take the audience and message into consideration.
I disagree with "polite" words having no emotion. Tell me you don't get anything from this sentence "Go to hell, you subhuman pest."
I think the tone & emphasis matters more than selecting some curse word. When I wrote the sentence, I was thinking the "subhuman pest" part was biting since it would be said in a sharp snapping tone & conveys more info than a swear word.
It's entirely possible to get your feelings across without ever using curse words. I commend people for having the emotional maturity and the vocabulary to do so. However, I feel it is emotionally disingenuous to censor yourself with "polite" versions of curse words, for example saying "shoot" instead of "shit" or "fudge" instead of "fuck".
I can understand if your surroundings aren't conducive to curses, like being around children or in polite company such as a work or religious environment, but if you're in a position where it is socially acceptable to curse but instead choose to censor yourself, I find you to be emotionally disingenuous or at least emotionally immature. If you choose to never ever curse, that's cool too. Again, I think it's commendable to never have to resort to curses. But if you have to use a curse word to get your point across, just use it if the environment is appropriate. Doubly so if it's in a written medium.
I know what you're trying to say when you type "f**k". You've done nothing but demonstrate to me that you would like to seem "proper" while still resorting to using offensive language. Emotionally disingenuous, or at best emotionally immature. If you feel like you must censor yourself, then just don't curse at all.
When I was but a youth, my mother used to regale me with this bit of wisdom: "Profanity is the result of a weak mind attempting to express itself forcefully."
Sometimes I'll reflect on this and think, "God damn, that bitch was a dumb fuckin' cunt if I ever met one!"
Ugh. There's a book about how to be a better boss, and one of the things it says is that adding a mild curse to otherwise normal speech will convince people you are being sincere. My boss read it.
"Well, this damn job isn't going to build itself!"
Well, it was one, I just didn't catch the typo of examples instead of example.
But, you're using an insult. Your example is already something nasty to say, no matter how you say it because you're attacking someone. Using curse words is no more or less effective at pissing the person off enough to shoot you (as an extreme but possible outcome).
For an example to work to support your opinion, it has to be undirected because directed statements are never neutral to begin with.
A better example would be something like pointing out a painting you don't like.
You could say, "that looks like something a five year old vomited up after drinking finger paints"
Or, "that thing is so fucking ugly it makes me want to vomit".
As long as the person you're saying it to isn't the artist, owner, or a dedicated fan of the artist, you have a relatively controlled example where the main difference is the presence of cursing.
See the difference in the examples? If I call you a giant moron, it doesn't matter much if I say fucking moron instead. It's the insult that's doing the work, not the adjective.
Now, this applies at any level of creativity. "You're about as pleasant as the south end of a north bound mule" is relatively creative, as is "you're a bigger asshole than the north end of a south bound elephant" very similar insults, with the significant difference being the cursing.
In that specific example, it could even be argued that the use of profanity increases the effect, and it would, depending on the target. Cursing is an amplifier in a huge swath of the population. "You're a jerk" isn't as effective as "you're a fucking jerk", because that extra step outside of social mores deepens the aggressiveness of the insult.
It's definitely subjective. There are people that would be more insulted by a well crafted, profanity free barb. But, on the whole, insults are about aggression and challenge. It's a form of dominance display to an extent. So using insults as an example for the effects of cursing is flawed by nature.
Now, a better example yet would be the weather. Someone saying "I'm tired of this fucking rain" is more boring than someone saying "I really wish thor would give us a warning before bukkakeing the world". Is bukkakeing an actual word? Doesn't matter, but it struck my mind lol. You can replace the jizz reference with "spitting on", if you feel sexual matters serve the same role as cursing.
Once you remove the insult factor, it becomes more about the cursing itself, which makes a better example and point of discussion.
aside from your opinions on cursing, mocking people for being fat is not cool.
just like people are born with different hair color, people's bodies look different. You can't tell based on somebody's body type whether they're living as healthy as they can.
Some people could have illnesses that make them fatter. Some people are just fat and healthy. In all cases, you should not mock people for being fat.
@Mr_No_Swearing@lemmy.zip This post was reported for fatphobia. I understand that you are using it as an example but we do want to avoid attacks on specific people or groups of people. Like you showed in your later posts, people swear at all sorts of things, like the weather, stubbing their toe, and missing the bus.
Do you mind changing the example in your original post? You can say that the example was changed at my request. Especially if you think changing the example will make the comments confusing.
Otherwise, I like your post. It's an interesting thing to think through and while it seems to be a little unpopular, my thoughts in the shower are often not fully thought through and would stand up poorly to the scrutiny of internet strangers.
Edit: I'm getting some down votes. I'm always open to hearing other people's thoughts if you would like to share. I make mistakes.
Swear words are fine. Attacking people's weight (or age, sexuality, gender, etc) should be avoided.
I'll admit that there is gray area in this rule. On Lemmy there are many instances of posts mocking celebrities for different characteristics but the posts seem to be permitted if the celebrities are largely disliked.
I dont have the ability to tag it NSFW. If you edit your original post you can tag it NSFW. source: https://lemmy.world/post/463392
If you editing your post, please consider replacing your example with something that steers well clear of people's characteristics. See this section of the rules for more details: https://legal.lemmy.world/tos/#1-attacks-on-users-or-groups