US companies can impose a MASSIVE chilling effect just by having your healthcare tied to your employment
mental abuse can be subtle (a form of psychological warfare) with something as simple as “we’re like a family here” or “you wouldn’t want to let down the team, would you?”
the first episode of Zom 100 gave a really good example of how far the mental abuse can escalate – between overwork, lack of sleep, verbal abuse, bad diet, you no longer have time to step back and think, you become completely dependent on someone else telling you what to do, you no longer have the strength of will to even contemplate saying “No”
I would consider what my company is doing right now as board line abuse. They've done two rounds of layoffs this year, but the amount of work as not been reduced in the slightest. So everyone is overworked and scared of saying anything in case there is another round of layoffs. Of course this is also having a ripple affect where long-term hardworking employees are jumping ship.
I currently have a backlog that is four years long. That was when I had a team working for me. Now I'm the only person on the team and not a week goes by when I don't get ask what the status of XYZ is. Or have 2-3 more "high priority" things added to my backlog.
I was an admin at a company that was borderline psychopathic. Yeah, tons of abuse at all levels. No progression unless you were a member of the executive teams family or married to one of them. Completely dysfunctional workplace.
If they required me to work in office (at minimum, they would need to pay me 30k more, 5-10k just to make up for gas and wear and tear on my car, 10k+ for the commute time, and 10k+ for the inconvenience, stress, clothes, eating out more for lunch, dealing with traffic, etc.)
Also, if my leadership was abusive and/or demanded prioritizing work over family and health.
I don't have the highest paid job in the world, but we're comfortable and I'm pretty happy with my company right now. Those are the things that would make me start looking elsewhere.
Cost of living in the US is 40-46% higher than Italy, and we do not have benefits like free or low cost Healthcare like they have in Italy. My wife's maximum out of pocket costs on her work sponsored insurance is almost 10k a year just for in-network services. If she has to go out of network for anything, her max is 18k for those services (which is in addition to the in-network pool). God forbid something terrible would happen, we could be liable for up to 28k in a calendar year just for her medical needs. We're pregnant right now trying to save 30k just so that we're covered for any medical expenses that will come up. My insurance is better than hers, but far from free.
Moreover, education is not free in the US. My tuition and books for my community college where I did the first two years of my degree (to save money) cost over 6k annually and the tuition at the state school where I finished the last two years of my degree was 10k annually. It would have been double that for both if I had gone to a school out of state.
I know I sound spoiled by comparison talking about needing such a big raise to even consider going back to the office. But it's not a 1:1 comparison, is my point. That being said, I definitely am spoiled in comparison your SE's in Italy and other European counties. Even with your lower cost of living and benefits all citizens enjoy, software engineers are underpaid there, imo. The work we do is highly skilled and lucrative. When put to good use and done correctly, it increases efficiency, bringing in more revenue while lowering costs, and it can create new streams of revenue as well. They should be compensated accordingly.
Edit: Oh, also just want to add that I just had to replace my car recently and we bought a, 6 year old, used, low-trim model minivan and that thing cost 25k after negotiating it down from 27k. And no way to take public transport to my company's nearest office from my home, and it's a 40 minute drive each direction for me is non-rush hour traffic. Would likely be double that each way if I had to make it in there for a 9-5. Just for some context on the cost of a vehicle and transport here right now.
Every job I've had as a developer, I've had a Linux box for development. Some I've also had a Windows laptop for specialty hardware vendor programs / portability, and some I've also had a MacBook from which to work.
I'm not going to whinge just because I don't get to use all of my personally preferred platforms, but if my employer ever denied me the necessary equipment or insisted upon the objectively wrong technology for a project - in any way - I'd simply leave if they refused to listen, since I'm not going down on a sinking ship.
Literally calling your employees your soldiers, calling starting positions as trenches, brainwashing your employees to a us versus the world mentality, ex-employees are 'dead' or 'on a suicidal path', etc.
Business is not war anyone who think it is has never saw what a single rifle bullet does to human flesh. Freaking psychos.
Task was being discussed, I raised valid concerns, they listened, agreed to the concerns and said 'yeah we still want you to do it'. I say I won't do this. They push harder. I left on the spot. Notice was on director desk the next day. I suspect management wanted me to take on a botched task so to have something negative over me. There may of may not have some level of nepotism there.
pay/benefits don't trickle down
shit trickles down
what I've learned is that 2 week notices only gives time for corporations to replace you with another unsuspecting victim so I'm just gonna run as soon as I can tell my work environment is toxic
In my field of work, two weeks isn't long enough to pull in someone new, but I do use the period to hand off as much as possible to those who I don't want to set up to fail.
If there's nobody to hand things off to, I just slack off and use it as free money until my next gig.
Culture where you're scared to criticize stuff, because people get angry when you're telling them the truth or even just the elephant in the room. Echo chamber instead of idea lab.
Management constantly making decisions such that no one decision made ever gets totally implemented, but the loose ends just stack up.
Management not involving engineers in the and assuming that engineers are incapable of understanding how the business works, let alone contribute valuable ideas to how it might work better.
Too many layers of hierarchy, competitive, macho male-dominated, title-driven, ego-driven culture where people are fighting they're way up the totem pole instead of working cooperatively together to create a great experience for their users.
Companies where silly little things that should be doable in hours costs weeks or months or where nothing gets done quickly, because too many people need to sign off on it.
Mission statement that is bogus and you know that it really is all about money, growth and status. I like companies that are truly trying to adding value to the world, however small that change may be. I am just not interested in your algorithmic trading, crypto non-sense, optimizing ad revenue or getting people to waste more of their time or money with endless bull crap.
Having to constantly fight to get the time to refactor, test, rethink, work on build/development/observability tooling instead of working on feature after feature endlessly. If I say something needs work I have good reasons for it that I am willing to explain, but do not assume that I like to waste time gold plating code because I am a autistic perfectionist with OCD with no sense for what the business is trying to do.
Constant bogus deadlines that seem to come from nowhere and are only meant to keep the pressure on the engineers. I work hard and this kind of pressure only means we're going to go fast in the short run and extremely slow in the long run, because nothing gets finished properly.
Running the server side on Windows. I want to be able to debug issues in depth when they arise.
Using the Go programming language. I am not going back to 80's programming and checking for nil all day long, just to see my program segment fault in production anyway. (and yes, I am talking from experience here)
Only remote companies. I get too lonely at some point and all the best cooperative ideas I've ever had in my career where born at the whiteboard with colleagues. This is just me though.
I'm extremely open to tech stacks and specific industries, though I would die happy if I never had to touch another line of TCL. Go to hell TCL, and take your upvar nonsense with you.
I'm currently between jobs and planning a career shift into a software engineer manager role, so I have been thinking about this quite a bit. A job I would leave - which is really leaving a manager/team, not a company - would rate poorly on these, which I'm polishing into a new "what type of position are you looking for?" answer:
A team that works cooperatively, as we accomplish more together than in competition. Everyone should strive to be world class at their roles, as being around that is critical for learning from each other.
An environment where clear and open communication is encouraged, including whatever anyone is struggling with.
Work that takes on difficult problems and strives to work through them with the highest standards.
A position that enables me to grow down my desired career path, which as of this writing means reporting to a software manager who is willing to delegate project management tasks and eventually people management as well.
Something I wouldn't reveal during an interview, though critically important, is a work environment that I can arrange such that it best enables me, and not be boxed in by someone else's conceived ideas of how software engineers should act or work. I've felt like a square peg in a round hole my entire life. Turns out it's a concrete objective fact (ADHD). I am so goddamn tired of feeling bad or apologizing for things that are actually just the scaffolding that I need to survive.
Left two jobs in the last 3 years because they offered remote and then tried to claw it back. If I ever set foot in an office again it'll be too soon.
I also tend to check in with myself on Sunday nights as I'm lying in bed. If I feel like I'm walking into a good situation the next morning, with good problems to solve and a decent chance of actually solving them, then I stick around. If I'm filled with dread awaiting the next off-hours disaster, I brush up my resume and flip the flag on LinkedIn.
Every engineering job I've left has been because of bad leadership.
The first, they hired a lead with no business being a lead. Not only was I much stronger from a technical perspective even though I had only been doing it professionally for about 3 years, but I was a better leader to the rest of the team as well. I had been sort of filling in in the interim before they were hired. They were let go not too long after I left.
The second, they hired an EM. I had been asked to work on setting up the code base for replatforming our web app and begin migrating pieces of it over. I was basically doing this on my own and working with timelines that I had given to leadership and providing weekly updates. This EM started micro-managing everything. This not only slowed my progress to a crawl, it was demotivating and stressful. They were let go not too long after I left.
My current position, I was moved to a new team during a company reorganization. The EM on this team is completely psychotic. Micro-managing to a degree that I've never seen before. They're convinced that what we do Agile SCRUM, but we take in large projects each quarter, plan and scope them at the beginning, and then spend the rest of the quarter executing on them. When I or the team make suggestions that align better with agile, we're gaslit and told our ideas "are waterfall not agile".
We usually don't take on projects that go longer than a quarter. The project that I'm on currently is bleeding into Q4. I warned about this from the very beginning, but the result was just more gaslighting, that I took too long on planning. I would have left, but the job market isn't as friendly to hopping around as it was previously. Thankfully, I'll be switching teams once this project is over.
Overall, all of these places had their problems beyond leadership. These are things that I can tolerate however, and with good leadership, can work towards improving. Once leadership turns to shit, it's time to gtfo.
Yup. Most of the stink in companies start at the top, but there are suprisingly few people who are actually good at leadership. There are so many ego trips in management.
Do you voice your concerns when it happens? In my experience people have communication methods that sometimes clash and they unknowingly disrespect other people. Some people are just assholes though...
At my previous company, they started forcing us to go back to the office, first once per week, then at least 8 days per month. I hated it but I could take it. Then, they said they had to replace our workstations with an SOE Laptop (some standard hardware and software configuration that is usually completely locked down, and you need to open a ticket to install anything). I hated this more, but I could still take it.
The last straw that made me quit was that my boss forced me to work on a project using a dead technology only because there was no one else that could do it. But I had absolutely zero experience with that technology. I was the only one who knew how to build a good user interface, so that's why the task fell on my lap.
Am I happy with my current workplace: people, culture, flexibility?
Am I valued to the company, i.e. my opinions are considered and regarded to some certain?
If one or two of these conditions failed, I would consider moving. After all, if I went to a workplace and I didn't find any joy or recognition, the paycheck wouldn't make me stay.
I read about the term "silent quitting": quitting without any prior warning, just handing in the resignation without a chance to remedy the situation.
Here's the thing - finding the next job took me effort. I'm not wasting that because the boss suddenly realized they can do better. They needed to figure that out before I took the effort to find my next gig.
And I expect the same now that I'm the boss. I do a one on one meeting with each of my direct reports like clockwork, and I ask probing questions about work conditions, career trajectory, and work/life balance.
It's not their job to make sure I know if they're satisfied with their job. It's my job.
Their job is to do all the other amazing things they do to make me look like an amazing boss.
Is salary the most important factor for you?
My employees have taught me that salary is the least important thing - right up until the moment when it becomes the most important thing. No one knows when that will be: surprise car repair, medical bill, whatever.
People tend to figure out their market value. I've never successfully retained a significantly underpaid professional over the long term. Of course, I do always get a healthy discount on the talent I hire. People value a great boss a lot. But having a great manager doesn't fix a leaking roof, so that discount amount has to be an amount they feel great about, not an insult to them.
remember that “2 weeks notice” is a kindness you’re giving them, it’s not a requirement and companies will never show you that kindness when they fire you
I'm likely to do that shortly. I'm in an environment with a few toxic colleagues who know fuck all about what needs to be done, or how to do it, but manage to impact decision making and cast doubt on my abilities and deliverables to date. I have had to step outside of my role to deliver multiple big ticket tasks (e.g. I've been brought on to uplift code for multiple applications, but have also had to build a MEM deployment from scratch as there was no endpoint management), but no-one has the knowledge or the interest in taking over the finished products, expecting I'll add it to my responsibilities.
A job is about to open up elsewhere that I've been encouraged to apply for, so I'll keep trudging along and will let them know at my notice period. I've tried so hard to get involved with no luck, so now they'll be forced to take interest.
I switched from Windows to Mac over a decade ago and never looked back. Working in software engineering at startups I always had Macs. I recently joined a larger company that is all Microsoft. I’m seriously burned out on having to use a Windows laptop and Windows software again. It’s just so kludgy and inefficient. I never really realized how bad it was until now.
I felt that same way when I started using MacOS for work, but got used to it.
The fact that there's no way to snap windows to a side of the screen without manually moving the window and resizing it is absurd. I have programs that allow me to do it, but like come on.
Also I still despise how fullscreen on MacOS works. It's so obnoxious.
Me too. I got a MacBook for testing Safari, but sometimes I take it to meetings because it's easier than extricating my usual machine from its dock (which unplugs the Ethernet cable so all my SSH sessions die along with anything running in them). But as somebody who likes having things in full screen (it bothers me if I can see the desktop peeking through), I get very annoyed needing to scroll through every app I've got open until I stumble across the one I want every time I have to switch context.
Maybe. I guess I hate the idea behind Jira more than Jira itself. I call it middle management driven Agile.
Also doesn't help that Jira (and Confluence) were fucking slow for a long while. Nobody wants to use slow software as an integral part of the dev chain.
Anything simple. I'm using Linear at my current job, which is fine. I've used Trello in the past, also fine. Best experience so far was using the GitLab issue tracker, but it as not a product team so YMMV.
Awesome 😀 But as you don't pay me I will only do what I like when I like to do so. So if your project is not FLOSS and useful for me or others I care about I will do nothing 🤷♂️ And if people need to pay (even through ads/datamining) to use it I'm out too.