It isn't double standards, it's patience for a fledgling replacement platform that seeks to free you from being a commodity to be exploited and sold, and lack of patience for the established, exclusively profit hungry platforms that continue to make your experience worse and disrespect you, solely to squeeze a few extra pennies out of you.
It's the difference between yelling at a professional pickpocket trying to rob you and a kid who is screwing up trying to help you. Resources matter, but more importantly, motivations matter.
I DO assume to have double standards. Of course they're not the same for the nonprofit that's trying to protect my privacy than for the company that's trying to sell it
A big part of the fediverse is that it's decentralized, one server going down doesn't mean you can't see anything, the rest of the network still exists and there are still people using that.
I follow quite a few communities across the lemmyverse so it's not too big of a deal, but I do know that it's a very large and popular instance (then again, my advice has always been to settle on a smaller instance anyways)